miniature schnauzer – Page 20 – Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess with Lucy and Chia

My Last Day of Being Two

Published on June 20, 2020June 15, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia20 Comments

Well, it turns out that I didn’t get to go anywhere with Mommy today. She left early with a cooler packed with ice bricks, and I saw Daddy packing her lunch. She said bye to me and Lucy and that she would be back, like she always does, just in case we think she is leaving for good.

Me and Lucy and Chippie played for a while until Daddy came upstairs from his basement office and asked what was going on.

By then, we all were worn out. Does that mean I’m getting old?

After we got kefirred at noon (that’s what it’s called when we get served our kefir at lunchtime), we went out on our new porch so we could hang out while we waited for Mommy to come home.

Me and Lucy played chase across the porch, not even slowing for the doggie door. We made a full circle of the yard before we slipped through the door again and onto the porch. I turned and ran back out before realizing that Luce the Deuce, er, Lucy wasn’t chasing me anymore. When I stuck my head in to peek, I realized it was a trap! Just look at Lucy’s tail! She was ready to spring on me! I turned and ran and off we went. We played so hard that once again we fell down exhausted.

87 hours later Mommy got home, and all she carried upstairs from the car was some groceries from Trader Joe’s. With my most excellent ears, I heard her ask Daddy to unload the rest into the downstairs freezer.

“I’m dreaming of a tripe birthday,
Not like the ones I’ve had before.
Where the innards glisten
And Lucy listens
To hear if we might be getting more…”

This is Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess, one day away from 3 years old, with this stupid, revised Christmas song stuck in my head.

Xena’s Birthday Weekend

Published on June 19, 2020June 15, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia22 Comments

Xena: Since it’s almost my birthday, can I lay in your Porch Bed, Lucy?

Lucy: You mean the Bed Formerly Known as Riley’s? Sure. I’m good right where I am.

Xena: Did you hear what Mommy was saying earlier about my birthday? She was talking about getting me a special treat and yummy food. She didn’t know I was cooling off behind her chair and could hear every word she said.

Lucy: I heard some of it, but I was under the table dozing. I don’t think she saw me, either.

Xena: I also got to see what she had up on her ‘puter screen. Look at this!

Xena: Then I heard her on the phone with someone saying she wanted the Tripe-stuffed cow hoof and two packs of the plain cow hooves and a case of the XKaliber mix like I used to eat growing up and would you be able to eat it too and I don’t know what the person answered her. Aaaand, she said she wanted to take me with her almost to Atlanta to pick it all up.

Lucy: You know, Xena, you could always ask Mom about it. Even if that ruins her surprise for you, I know you won’t let it go until you find out. Here she comes now.

Xena: Mommy, are we going to Atlanta to get my birthday surprise?

The Mom: No. (We’re actually going to Marietta, north of Atlanta, but I’m not telling her that.)

This is Xena the almost birthday girl, wondering if I should get my ears checked. I was sure I heard her say… *sigh*

Our New Porch

Published on June 13, 2020June 12, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia20 Comments

Way, way back at the end of March, work began on our patio. Mom said, “It better be done before Memorial Day, ha, ha, ha.” With a few veiled threats from Mom, i.e. “I’m not paying you any more money until this is done, ha, ha,” it got done the Friday before Memorial Day weekend. Dad says it’s not a patio anymore; he says it’s a “porch.”

Dad bought paving stones made out of river rock. You can see in one of the pictures how he arranged them outside the door that doesn’t go into the dog lot. Mom put in the edging, and they are going to get some pebbles or something to fill in the rest of that area.

Did you notice the “sunroof?” It lets in lots of light, and even the living room has more daylight because of it.

Did you notice the aloe plant on the little table. We want to say a huge “thanks” and a few *licks* to our reader who suggested that to heal up the hot spot under my (Xena’s) ear. It worked like magic!

Right away, Mom taught us how to go through the new doggie door. We have gotten very good at it. At first I would get whacked with it when Lucy went first, but then I learned to time it just right.

Mom couldn’t mow the grass in the dog lot the whole time the guys were working on the new porch. It got so high that we played “jungle” in it and sometimes munched on the tall stocks of grass. And there’s areas where the weeds that passed for grass died because of stuff laying on them during the construction. We saw some grass seed last time we went in the shed, so we’re sure Mom will spread some around soon. We heard the mower running tonight. No more fun in the jungle, but we’ll still have lots of fun sunbathing and hunting snakes and lizards.

We are Lucy and Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess

Riley, Bed Stealing and a GiftR

Published on June 9, 2020September 6, 2021 by Xena, Lucy and Chia29 Comments

iley: I’ve been feeling better about being here with Lucy (and Xena). Although I still miss my Dad, I know he’ll come back for me and I might as well enjoy my time here. Right? I’ve started eating more – I really love that sauerkraut and coconut oil that Miss Amy mixes into my food – and I’ve had more energy. Lucy and I run in the big front yard while little Xena runs after us and jumps and barks and growls at me. I finally figured out she’s not trying to be mean or “take me on” but its’ her way of playing. I ignore her, as she usually just bounces off of me. In this video, me and Lucy played kinda rough, so Miss Amy kept Xena away.

Every evening between 7:00 and 8:00 I start barking at Mr. Jeff. Miss Amy always knows what I want, so at first she had to cue him, “Riley wants you to throw his ball.” Now he knows, and we play ball in the house – down the hallway and into the bedroom or the library or the living room. It’s nice to have a guy like my Dad who will play ball with me.

My bed got moved into the living room so I have somewhere other than the hard floor to lay when the family is together in the evening.

As everyone was getting ready to go to bed the other night, Miss Amy noticed that I had stretched out so that my head was hanging off my bed. She knows that I still chew up things – at least stuffies – so she went through the house looking for something she “didn’t care about”. Then she remembered the brown blanket that I had chewed big holes in years ago. She retrieved it from the closet and laid it all bunched up under my head like a pillow. I slept especially good that night.

The next day, when I got up to eat breakfast, that crazy schnauzer ran and jumped into my bed.

She and Lucy eat a lot earlier than I do, so her beard was all spiky-wild from her food. Then she acted like she had to guard my bed so I wouldn’t try to get back in it. Silly schnauzer! I spent the rest of the day in her favorite red chair. That one kinda back-fired on her, didn’t it?

The Mom: I don’t like to wear shoes in the house unless my feet are cold so I often slip them off when I sit down. One particular day, I found a present in one of my sandals.

I don’t know who left it there, but it warmed my heart.

It *might* have been me. Or Xena. Or Riley. We all love Mom.

Epilogue: Andrew picked up Riley and took him home with him. Riley may be coming back…or he may not. Either way, Lucy and I love having him here. And, I suspect, even the crazy little schnauzer does, even though she would never admit it.

By Riley, Lucy, the Mom and the Crazy Little Schnauzer Warrior Princess

Xena’s Story: Sho and Tye Think Canada Part 3

Published on May 29, 2020May 29, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia28 Comments

Where we left off was with a beautiful, 3-point landing of Sho’s magic carpet, right in front of the hut Canada in Tyeland, Shortly afterward, Sho drifted into a deep sleep (probably from exhaustion, although Xe drove all the way there from Tennessee, so Sho shouldn’t have been that tired). If you missed that, you can go read about it here at the Canadian Cats. As Sho lay snoring…

Tye: Are you getting bored, Xe?

Xe: Yes. We need an adventure. *thinking* Hey! Do you remember how we wanted to try stuffing a mouse down a cobra’s throat, but your big sister Sho was always around so we couldn’t do it?

Tye: Yep, and she’s sound asleep in our hut Canada now.

The friends, about to embark on an adventure, take off through the jungle, looking for a mouse and a cobra.

Tye: Hold the snake still!
Xe: I’m trying. Maybe there’s a stick or rock that could help.
Tye: No!! Don’t let it go!
Mouse: Help!! Help!! I don’t want to die!
Xe: That mouse screaming for help isn’t helping. And you went up too high in the palm.
Cobra: *gurgle* You’re choking me!
Tye: I’m hanging down as low as I can without falling.
Xe: There’s a little stick I could wedge in the snake’s mouth.
Cobra: When I get loose *gurgle* I’m gonna kill you, *gag* you stupid schnauzer.
Tye: Forget it, he’ll get you while your back is turned. On the count of 3, we both let go and run as fast as we can. One, two, run!

A short while later…

Sho: *yawn* I had a good nap. Did you two do anything interesting while I was asleep.

Xe: You mean like shove a mouse down a cobra’s throat? Woof, woof!
Tye: Yeah, or almost fall out of a palm? Meow, meow, meow.
Xe: We waited on you to take a nice walk with us.
Sho: You two are so funny. Let’s stroll down the jungle lane to see if there’s anything interesting going on. Some pretty flowers should be blooming this time of year.

Xe, whispering to Tye: Do you think the cobra’s gone? Remember, he threatened to kill me!
Tye, whispering to Xe: Maybe, but let’s wear sunglasses or hats just in case, so he doesn’t recognize us. We’ll have to keep a watchout. And “flowers” will be our code word for cobra.

Tye: Do you see any flowers?
Xe: Nope, nothing.
Sho: Look, I see a flower over here.
Tye and Xe: Eeeeek!

At that, Tye and Xe turned and ran (again) all the way back to the hut Canada.

Sho: Those two are so funny together. I’m glad they’re having a good time.

Sho never suspected that the “pretend” story of a cobra and a palm could be true, and she continues to sleep well because of it.

This concludes part 3, but stay tuned for part 4, coming to a blog near you.

Xena Schnauzer Warrior Jungle Princess

The Hunter Princess and The Worrier

Published on May 20, 2020May 17, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia32 Comments

The Mom: Why are you staring at me, Riley? What do you want?

Riley: I just ate and I need to go out.

*a few minutes later*

Lucy: Where’d you go, Riley? I saw you go into the woods and thought you had run off.

Riley: Nah, I just had to do my business and I don’t like anyone watching. Besides, why would I mess in my own yard, or in my family’s yard? That’s just nasty. And why would you think I ran off?

Lucy: It’s cause Mom told me she had a dream about you and me running off together through the woods like we used to do a couple of years ago. In her dream, she found you near her old neighborhood and brought you home. But she never found me. She said it was a terrible dream. It woke her up and she never went back to sleep that night. So I am staying out of the woods.

Now, where did Xena go? It’s so hard being the responsible one, trying to keep track of every body.

Xena: I found a hole; two holes, actually. I can smell a critter.

Lucy: What’s in the hole? Don’t you have to go potty?

Xena: I don’t know yet, and I already went. Now will you please be quiet? I need silence. Absolute. Silence.

Lucy: Whatcha doin’ over there, Riley?

Riley: These leafs taste good. *munch munch*

Xena: Shhhhhh!

Xena: (thinking) I see you.

(thinking) Gotcha! Oh crap, it got away.

I am Xena Schnauzer Hunter Princess

Riley

Published on May 16, 2020May 17, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia17 Comments

Xena’s viewpoint: Why, oh why, oh why is he living here with us again?

Riley won’t listen to anything I woof. He watches when I get my food and I’m afraid he’s going to eat it. Even my schnauzer warrior moves wouldn’t prevail against this 70 pound behemoth. Mommy threw my ball for me and Riley got it. When I tried to get it back from him, he hit me in the head with his tooth, and now there’s a hole where my ear meets the top of my head. I screamed and wouldn’t go near him for a few days. I even got behind Mommy every time he came near. And he has taken over my chair, so I can’t lay on the top of it and watch outside. I wish he would just go home.

Lucy’s viewpoint: My buddy is back. He’s 20 pounds bigger than me, but I’m almost as tall as him. Sometimes we run and play in the front yard like we used to do. I love having Riley here. Did I mention he’s my friend?

Riley’s viewpoint: My Dad Andrew brought me over to Lucy’s to visit. Or at least I thought I was just visiting. But then he said he had to stay with friends for a while and I could stay here with his Mom. It’s true that she takes real good care of me and feeds me things I like and gives me pills for itching and pets and scritches me. But I miss my Dad Andrew…a lot.

I’ve had some fun times playing with balls and bones (I didn’t mean to hurt that silly schnauzer). And Lucy is a sweet girl and fun to play with. I’ve been real good. I’ve gone into the woods to potty and not run off. I always wag hello when I see the neighbors on our walks, especially the little kids. I love little kids. The guy working on the patio brought his teeny tiny 3 month old chihuahua and I was very, very careful not to hurt or scare him. We could even be friends if he wants.

I was even sorta, kinda good for my bath and nail trim. OK, so Mr. Jeff had to hold me for the nails, but at least they got cut, right? I even let Lucy have everyone’s favorite red chair this afternoon.

I just miss my Dad Andrew so much. He’s my heart-person. Every time I see the other patio worker guy drive his white truck up the driveway, I think it’s my Dad coming to get me. I get excited and start to bark. Then there’s the let-down.

When are you coming to get me, Dad? I’m OK, but I miss you so much.

Cone Head

Published on May 14, 2020May 13, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia42 Comments

I’ve been itching. It’s that time of year, I’m told. At first, Mommy had high hopes that my allergy serum injections would finally keep me from itching this year. I think I’m doing better, but I’m still itchy. My ears itch, so I scratch right under them. Then I always get something called a hot spot. Mommy started treating the new hot spot with some Tea Tree Essential Oil mixed in coconut oil. Then, this morning, Mommy found another hot spot under my other ear. I had been scratching during the night, and no one knew because “dogs aren’t allowed to sleep in the bedroom” anymore. Something about the peeps not getting any rest with us there. So now, Mommy is mixing Oregano Essential Oil in coconut oil and putting it on both hot spots. And I have to wear the cone.

At least I can see the ‘puter and still help Mommy in her home office.

I am still Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess

Xena’s Story: Sheltering in Place with Sho & Tye Part 2

Published on May 4, 2020April 27, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia27 Comments

Sho: Well, if we had to be stuck somewhere other than Canada during this pandemic, I’m glad it was here with you and Xe. And Tye had the right idea with this spa tub. I – being a cat – didn’t think I would like it. But it’s so relaxing.

Lu: It’s true, Sho. And this inoculation of Corona tastes pretty good. Do you think it would work better if we had it in “shots”?

Both: BOL, MOL, ha, ha, ha, *hic*

Xe: Hey, what are you two doing?

Tye: OMC, I can’t look. I think they’re naked!

Lu: Of course we are, silly cat. None of us wears clothes. Well, except when you put on that strange-looking hula skirt. The real question is, what have you two been up to?

Tye: I flipped Xe the bird. Xe: And then I shot Tye the bird. Both: Yep, we kept flipping each other the bird and it was lots of fun.

*earlier that day*

Tye: I’m so glad we found these old rackets up in your attic. *whack*

Xe: *whack* Me too, Tye. Shoot that angry bird back to me and I’ll flip this one right back atcha.

New Patio and Ants

Published on April 30, 2020April 27, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia32 Comments

Today we are joining Brian’s Thankful Thursday

Lucy: Our brother Andrew came over and power washed our fence and patio and the parts of our house that needed it. While he was working on the fence, he left Mom a message on the patio.

The top part says “ADR,” which are Andrew’s intials. And we are sure you can read the bottom part. This put a big smile on Mom’s face.

We’re having a new patio built on the back of our house. That is the reason Mom asked Andrew to come over and power wash the patio. At first, after the old, temporary patio enclosure was removed, we still had a “temporary” fence to keep us in the dog lot area. After that was taken down, we became “free range.”

We keep finding different paths out to the yard as the building progresses. But we aren’t allowed outside unless Mom or Dad are with us. Me and Xena, we’re very good about staying in – or at least close to – the yard. And we come when called. You might remember when I used to run off with Riley. That was right after Xena came to live with us, and, well, I’ll admit it: I was jealous. Now I understand that life is better with a little sis, and that Mom and Dad love me just as much as before she came – maybe even more!

Xena: Big Black Ants have been invading our home. They look like this.

They’re called carpenter ants, which is silly, since I never saw them building anything. Hey, wait, maybe they’re carpenters’ ants, and the guys building our new patio brought them!

They don’t taste as good as the little brown ants, though.

In any case, I’ve been following them around and trying to eat them. Now that I know they taste yucky I just show Mommy where they are, and she comes and steps on them. When Daddy sees one, he steps on it too. I can hear them crunch. Since Mommy only runs the scary vacuum once a week, the bodies started piling up. After the weekly vacuuming we noticed something interesting. No more ants appeared. Now we think they were all coming for the funerals of their fallen comrades.

Lucy: Mom keeps talking about how nice the new patio will be, and how we can all sit outside without being devoured by mosquitoes. We will be sure to show you pictures of us enjoying our new outside space when it is (finally) done. We’re even going to have a doggie door between the patio and the dog lot! And it won’t be one made by Xexe, like the last one was.

Both: So, today we are thankful that we’ll soon have a nice new patio where Mommy will spend all her time outside with us and we are also thankful that the ant invasion has ended.

XOX from Lucy and Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess

Easter Bunny #36950 Confesses All

Published on April 25, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia19 Comments

Lucy: Why are you still at our house, Easter Bunny? Easter was a long time ago. And, come to think of it, you didn’t bring us anything.

Easter Bunny: Your Mom mistook me for one of your stuffies and I got thrown in the washer and dryer with them. (see here) After that, I was so traumatized, I couldn’t remember what I was supposed to do. Your stuffies took pity on me and let me sleep in their nice big crate. After I woke up, I shared the rest of the candy with them. Now I see why all you pups and kitties and little peeps look forward to me coming every year.

Xena: Do you mean no one in the world got any candy for Easter?

Easter Bunny: Oh no, not at all. First of all, there are thousands, nay, millions of us bunnies who deliver candy all around the world very early on Easter morning. I’m Bunny #36950. Second, your house was my last stop.

Lucy and Xena: So you mean we’re the only ones who didn’t get candy?

Easter Bunny #36950: Don’t blame me! It’s all your Mom’s fault. *shudder* You may have to meet me down by the street next year. Now, if you’ll excuse me, while I’ve had a lot of fun playing with Rainbow Bear and Sweetheart Bear and Chippy, and oh, by the way, who chewed the nose off of Oscar the baby schnauzer? That pup isn’t getting any candy next year!

Xena: Well, uh, you see, uh… Gee, it was nice having you visit, Easter Bunny #36950, and please be sure to come back next year with candy for us both. But maybe you should go now before Mommy decides to put you up in the attic until next Spring.

Lucy and Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess, who didn’t get any Easter candy (and might not next year)

Sheltering in Place: Ideas for Dogs

Published on April 23, 2020April 22, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia27 Comments

Today we join in Brian’s Home Thankful Thursday

Lucy doesn’t play with Mom, but Lucy and me, we wrestle and play chase outside in the yard almost every day.

Thankfully, our restrictions are few and our routine has changed very little. We do have Mom and Dad home more, which we both love. But we know it’s not like this for all of our doggie friends, so we looked through Mom’s email and found this info to help with boredom and – Dog forbid – being forced to go potty inside because you’re not allowed outside! Here’s Your COVID-19 Canine Survival Guide.

STORY AT-A-GLANCE

If you’re a dog parent, you may be in need of a “canine survival guide” while you’re hunkered down at home during the current COVID-19 crisis

Be sure to have at least a month’s worth of pet supplies on hand, including all the things your dog typically needs on a daily and weekly basis

It also may be necessary to train your dog to go potty indoors while you’re quarantined or under a stay-at-home directive

Enriching your dog’s environment during this time is the best way to keep her mentally stimulated, manage her stress level, and avoid problem behaviors

Click here to read the details. There’s lots of fun stuff and helpful information!

Now I’m waiting for Mom to stop working so that we can try out some of these fun new games she has promised to play with me (especially the ones involving treats). I think I’ll go downstairs and remind her.

Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess and Lucy

Xena’s Story: Sheltering in Place with the Siamese Sisters

Published on April 20, 2020April 20, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia26 Comments

Tye: I’m getting bored with this Shelter in Place thingie. Hey Xe, let’s play a new game.

Xe: OK, what do you want to play?

*a bit later*

Tye: Sit still, I’m almost done fixing your hair. Then I’ll do your nails.

Xe: Curlers in my beard? And I see nail clippers! I’m outa here.

Tye: Wait, Xe, you’re going to like this next part….trust me.

Xe: Mmmm, can I have the recipe for this juicy drink? When can I eat the cucumber slices?

Tye: Wait til I’m done with my spa soak and I’ll get you finished up, Xe.

*meanwhile*

Lucy: What do you suppose Tye and Xe are doing in the house?

Sho: Hmm, all I know is I’m enjoying laying here in the sun. Do you like the drink I made for you, Lu? I’m sure those two are having fun playing some silly game or another.

Tye: And then you step like this *hic* and wave your front arms *hic* and wiggle your hips. *meow, meow, meow*

ISO-Lympics Freestyle Way

Published on April 16, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia36 Comments

Thanks to Bella, Roxy and Dui’s for hosting the Blogville ISO-lympics

I’m doing Freestyle dancing for the ISO-Lympics! This is intended to delight and amuse you while Sheltering in Place. I happily accept a gold medal for my efforts!

https://videopress.com/v/86h6PFFR?preloadContent=metadata

XOX Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess

Poor, Pitiful Oscar

Published on April 11, 2020April 11, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia24 Comments

Lucy: Hey Xexe, what did you do to Oscar? Where’s his nose? And what happened to his beard? But mostly, where’s his nose?

Xena: Um, I was grooming him, you see, and I was trimming his beard with my teeth, and, well, and I must have gotten too close to his nose.

Lucy: You ate his nose? Are you a barbarian?

Xena: I didn’t eat it!

Lucy: What if Mom did that to you when she’s grooming you? Look at Oscar. He’s pitiful. Poor puppy.

Xena: I’m so sorry, Oscar. I didn’t mean to hurt you.

I’ll tell you what, Oscar, sweetie. We’ll get dogtor Lucy to fix you up, and I’ll ask Mommy to groom you from now on. What’s that? Will it hurt? No *giggle* not at I’ll. I’ll gas you and you’ll sleep right through it.

*a short time later*

Lucy: That was a delicate operation.

Oscar didn’t have any health insurance, but he said to send the bill to you, Xena.

Lucy and the failed groomer aka Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princes, (and Oscar)

Now, to reveal what my #10 mystery item was on the Scavenger Hunt. (If you missed it, you can read it here.) Ruby, Millie & Walter, and Phenny & Nelly all got it right.

It’s a lamp, one of two that I bought from a dance studio that was closing. Thanks to Hootin’ Anni for hosting this hop. It’s going on until the 15th, so go ahead and have some fun with it by clicking here.

In Pursuit of Flavors

Published on March 31, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia30 Comments

Lucy: We are joining with Easy Blog and the Canadian Cats Blog today to give Uncle Bob (can we call you “uncle,” Uncle Bob?) can make some different suppers for him and Aunt Jean (can we call you “aunt,” Aunt Jean?).

The Canadian Cats Blog and Easy Blog

Lucy: Xena and I help keep the floor clean when Mom is cooking, so we can tell you, this dish we’re about to give you the recipe for is super yummy. And it’s dog and cat friendly right up to the point where you add the raisins. It’s supposed to be cran-raisins, which we could eat, but Mom uses raisins ’cause they don’t have any added sugar. If you don’t care about things like added sugar, go with the dried cranberries ~~so we can eat some of it~~, cause it’s even yummier that way.

This recipe is called BUTTERNUT SQUASH WITH APPLE AND CRANBERRIES (or RAISINS)

Mom forgot to take a picture of it when she took it out of the oven, and her and Dad dove into it, so this is all that’s left. At least we caught her before she ate it all for lunch today.

Xena: We hear this is really easy to make once you get past the killing the squash part. Here’s how you do it.

Part 1: Get one butternut squash and nuke it in the microwave for about 4 or 5 minutes to soften it a little. Be sure to poke some holes in it with a fork first so it is injured and doesn’t get away. Then peel it with an apple peeler if you have one, or just a paring knife if you don’t. Slice open it’s belly and remove all the seeds. We like to eat any guts, er seeds, that miss the trash can. Cut up what’s left into smallish cubes, or even medium size cubes if you’re in a hurry or don’t like cutting. Just so it fits in your mouth when it’s cooked. Dump it all in a great big bowl.

Part 2: Core and chop up 3 or 4 apples. We don’t care what kind, as long as they cook good in the oven. No need to peel them. Dump them in with the squash.

Part 3: Dump in 1/4 cup of butter, 1/2 to 1 cup dried cranberries or raisins, 1/4 teaspoon each of cinnamon and nutmeg, and about 3 tablespoons of sugar. (Mommy uses Stevia – it’s that sugar thing again.)

Lucy: This next part involves heat and fire, so I’ll take it from here. After mixing everything up, dump it in a great big casserole dish, the bigger the better – like 3 quarts – and put it in a hot oven that’s set to 425F/220C degrees. Cook it for 30 minutes, then lower temperature to 350F/175C degrees and keep cooking for another hour. It will be done and ready to eat. HOWEVER, after the first 30 minutes, our Mom lowers the temp to 325F/163C and cooks it for about 2 and a half or 3 more hours. That way, it shrivels up and is sweet like a dessert.

Lucy and Xena: Whichever way you cook it, it’s yummy-scrumpdilyishus! Uh Mom, did you just eat all that? And you didn’t save any for Dad? Or us?

Pee S: This makes a very large amount, so you might want to either just get a small butternut squash and use 2 or 3 apples or you might want to just use half the squash.

Xena's Story Part 5

Published on March 30, 2020March 30, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia18 Comments

Lucy: Your stories are selling like hotcakes, Xena. We should be getting royaltreats or something like that. I’m going to check with our publicist. Oh Mo-o-o-o-ommm…

Xena: What’s the “we?” I’m doing all the work.

If you missed any of our story, you can click on Part 1 and Part 2 and Part 3 and Part 4. It’ll help Part 5 make more sense…

Xena’s story: A Dog and her Cat Friends, with another Plot Hound, Part Five

The driver in the old truck barked at them to stop. “Y’all stop now, y’hear? I’m your ride to the big white house. Didn’t Ho No tell y’all to ‘spect me?”

“So you aren’t the ICY Plott Hound from Texas?” the two friends asked.

“Golly no, I’m a NICE Plott Hound from the hills of Georgia. My name’s Sally. That thar one you mentioned is my cousin Leroy. He thanks he’s hot stuff. Come on and jump in the back and I’ll getcha where yer goin”.

“I think we should trust her,” whispered Xe. “What do you want to do, Tye?”

“Let’s get in. We can always jump out if it’s a trick. But my gut feeling is she’s one of the good hounds.” So off they went in the back of the truck, getting ever closer to the big white house.

*87 hours later* (It was an old, slow truck.)

“Here we are, little ladies,” woofed Sally, “the big white house is thar, behind all those bushes. Which reminds me, it’s time for a potty break.”

“Let’s go find the person who can help us stop this unjust incarceration of Siamese cats,” meowed Tye. She jumped out the window of the truck, and Sally helped Xe down from the truck bed. Before she would go any further, Xe ran a comb through her beard and leggings and put on her favorite scarf, so as to make a good impression on the person in charge. Xe asked Sally, “Is this the big white house?”

“Well,” Sally replied as she hurried off to do her bizness in the bushes, ” it is a big white house, now ain’t it?” After bagging up her droppings in a Mickey D’s carry out container left over from lunch the previous day, Sally hopped behind the wheel and drove off in a cloud of white exhaust fumes.

After Xe and Tye stopped coughing, they climbed the many steps up to the front door of the big white house, where they woofed and meowed as loudly as they could until the door opened. Upon telling the door man why they were there, they were ushered into a stately sitting room, where they waited for the Person In Charge, who they decided to refer to as PIC.

Pretty soon the PIC entered the room. Xe had seen pictures of the ICY PIC who lived there, and was not looking forward to this encounter. As expected, this man was tall, made even taller by the stove top hat he was wearing. “That’s different – I’ve never seen him wear a hat on TV,” thought Xe. His hair wasn’t that fake yellow, and his face didn’t look the same, either. Maybe a new person had moved in and taken over, she thought. He lowered himself into the largest chair in the room and removed his black hat. “Welcome to the big white house,” he said congenially. “What can I do for you today?”

“I would like some fresh meat and veggies, please,” Xe politely asked, just before her stomach started growling again.

Tye started to protest, meowing that wasn’t the reason they were there, but the NICE PIC clapped his large hands. The person who answered the door entered the room, and the NICE PIC told him to bring his guests food, saying, “No one can think right on an empty stomach. Give them whatever they want.”

Xe requested salmon, and whatever fresh veggies were available. After thinking for only a moment, Tye asked for shrimp. While they were eating, the NICE PIC told them entertaining stories about his childhood and his beloved dogs and cats. Soon they were able to relax with full bellies and an affinity for the NICE PIC.

Tye settled into her new friend’s lap, partially slipping under his suit coat to keep warm. Xe sat at his feet while they took turns relating the injustice of incarcerating innocent Siamese cats, as well as the horrors of the detention center. The NICE PIC, who said they could just call him Abe, softly stroked Tye while listening attentively. As their story came to an end, he promised to make a Proclamation declaring all animals and people equal, and that he would put an immediate end to the detentions. They sensed he was an honest person, and thanked him profusely.

“Now, let’s get a picture of us all for posterity,” he said. I believe this day will go down in history. Xe was very glad she had spiffed herself up after her long journey, and hoped no food was stuck to her beard as was wont to happen. Abe assured her that she looked lovely, so she relaxed and faced the camera.

The two friends accepted the invitation to stay the night, and, after a night-night treat, slept soundly in a big soft bed.

The next morning they all ate hearty breakfasts which had been prepared specifically to each of their tastes and diets. It was a beautiful, sunny day and Xe and Tye were outside taking care of necessary business in the bushes when a shadow suddenly covered them both. Tye began to jump up and down, meowing loudly. Xe thought the shadow must be from a cloud until she looked up – and would have wet her pants if she had any on and if she hadn’t already taken care of that business – and saw something she thought was only in story books. Abe had offered them a helicopter ride back to Tennessee, but it seemed they wouldn’t need to use it after all.

Be sure to check out what actually happens next by reading Shoko’s story at The Canadian Cats this Friday! Then come back next Monday for the grand finale of my story.

Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess with Lucy as my Editor

The Bears are Back

Published on March 27, 2020March 23, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia26 Comments

Xena: Who’s up there on the bed whispering? Make way, I’m coming up.

Yay! You’re all out of hibernation, and look! There’s our missing Mr. Eleephant!! Sweetheart, your eye looks odd. Do you have pink-eye?

Sweetheart Bear: No, Xena, that’s just my pink furs that got in it. You can lick them away from my eye if you want. And yes, we found Mr. Eleephant. Well, actually, Rainbow bear found him sitting on the front step. He was a bit hungry and cold, but otherwise he’s ok.

Elle: The bears are having a post-hibernation confab and I was invited because I’m Mr. Eleephant’s care-taker when he is here.

Jen Jen Bear: Yes we’re discussing how to keep everyone alive and safe from that Riley dog, as well as what to do about that Scoundrel Ludwig.

Riley: Why does everybody always pick on me?

Ludwig suddenly appears: Mr. Eleephant, it’s good to see you’re alive and well. I had urgent business to…

Rainbow Bear: Ludwig, you scoundrel! We take care of our own around here. How dare you abandon Mr. Eleephant on the front porch while you tried to spy on Xena! (click here if you missed this)

Ludwig: Mr. Eleephant is OK – he’s a tough old coot. And well, I, I, I already wore the cone of shame. Isn’t that enough? Can’t we all be friends again?

The bears and the elephants discussed how they wanted to handle this, and what to do next. An executive decision was made…

OK, all y’all, game’s on. Last one to Xena’ kennel is a rotten Ludwig!

This is Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess and Chippy the chipmunk with a hoard travelling to my kennel.

Xena's Story Part 4

Published on March 23, 2020March 23, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia27 Comments

Lucy: Xena, you’re on a roll, so take it away!

Xena: Take it away where? What are you talking about, Lucy? I’m watching to see where this squirrel goes.

Lucy: I mean, go ahead with more of your story. Your adoring fans are waiting to hear what happens next. *sigh* I’ll watch the squirrel for you.

If you missed any of our story, you can click on Part 1 and Part 2 and Part 3. It’ll help Part 4 make more sense…

Xena’s story: A Dog and her Cat Friends, with another Plot Hound, Part Four

With a newly-found resolve, Xe and Tye headed in the general direction they thought was toward Tennessee. It was early morning, so they kept the sun on their right as they walked. From old habits in Siam, where Tye was from, they kept away from the water as they traveled, so nothing could jump out and eat them. As they walked they talked about many things. The pair recalled the fun they had together in Siam, and how Tye would catch mice to throw at any leopards or tigers they might encounter. That led to Tye relating her voyage from Siam to Texas and the mice she caught and cared for. Then the conversation took a more serious turn.

“You know what happened to you when you got off the ship wasn’t right.” Xe got angry just thinking about it. “We need to do something so it doesn’t happen to any more Siamese cats.”

“It’s true, Xe. I was so excited, thinking about seeing you again and the fun we would have, and the next thing I knew I was sitting in that detention center eating rotten vegetables. I hadn’t done anything wrong! I don’t understand why I got treated like that!”

“We need to go to the big white house and ask the people in charge to make those ICY people stop doing that,” exclaimed Xe. But it’s a long walk; we’re going to need a ride.”

No sooner did Xe woof their need for a ride than a horse came galloping up to them.

“I hear you’re in need of a ride.” The horse bowed her head as she addressed Xe. “How can I help you free everyone of tyranny and oppression and rotten vegetables?”

Xe and Tye looked up at this huge horse, who seemed to genuinely want to help them, even if she was a bit zealous and also a bit off the mark of their goal. “What is your name?” they asked in unison, both with a slight quiver of fear in their voices.

“I am a Horse with No Name,” replied the magnificent creature. “Tell me why you are out here in the middle of nowhere, and where you want to go.”

Xe was spell-bound that there could be a Horse with No Name. Ignoring the horse’s question, Xe asked, “Have you been to the desert? I hear in the desert you can remember your name.”

When the Horse with No Name didn’t reply, Tye and Xe related their experiences over the past few days.

“Stay here,” said the horse as she wheeled about on her hind legs and cantered off into the scrub brush, just out of earshot. They could hear her whinnying and nodding her head, but couldn’t make out what she was saying into her iphone.

“Both of you, climb on my back and I will get you as far as I can,” the Horse with No Name told them as she skidded to a stop in front of them.

The two friends looked at each other, and, with unspoken agreement leaped upon the Horse with No Name’s back.

As their newest friend started off at a full gallop, Xe and Tye laid down and hung on for dear life. “Ho No!” they screamed,” we’re going to die!”

“How did you guess that I go by ‘Ho No?’ asked the Horse with No Name.

“Is that a Hawaiian word?” asked Tye.

“No, it’s short for HOrse with NO Name,” replied the horse. “And I won’t let you die. I’ll stop if I feel one of you slipping off.”

On like that they went for about 87 miles, with Ho No settling into a smooth trot that she could keep up for hours. The riders kept their eyes closed for a long time, pressing themselves against her broad, flat back. Except for an occasional grunt, their claws digging into her sides didn’t seem to bother Ho No at all. At one point, Tye opened her eyes, and seeing how pretty Ho No’s mane was braided, asked her about it. “It’s because I’m a girl,” Ho No said as if that was the only explanation needed.

After what felt like 87 hours Ho No came to a halt. “This is the end of the line for me, girls,” she whinnied. I’ve gotten you as far as northeast Georgia. I spoke with one of my friends, who is going to pick you up and take you the rest of the way to the big white house.”

“Will we see you again?” Tye began to ask, but Ho No had already disappeared down the back dirt road in a cloud of dust. Or maybe it was a cloud of red clay since they were, after all, in Georgia

They waited there for about 87 minutes, watching for another horse to appear, hopefully one with a real name. They were taking advantage of the fresh water nearby (that Ho No had promised was safe), when an old truck came charging down the road.

“Xe Xe,” whispered Tye, ” get your nose out of the grass and look at this. I think maybe the ICY Plott Hound has found us, but something looks different about him.”

At that, Xe whipped around, ready to make a run for it with Tye.

To be continued…

Not Quite Wordless Wednesday: Cone of Shame

Published on March 18, 2020March 15, 2020 by Xena, Lucy and Chia27 Comments

Xena: To start off our not quite WW we want to wish everyone a belated happy St. Patrick’s Day, and feature the back of the green shirt that was printed during Angel Lexi’s second run as Toto in the Wizard of Oz.

Can you find Lexi’s name? The first one to get the right answer will win… oh, never mind; Lucy’s just going to stop me anyway.

Lucy: Next, we want to feature the infamous cone of shame. You may remember that “Lois” showed up at our front door claiming to be Ludwig’s cousin. You can click here if you missed that one. Many of you were justifiably dubious, and thought it was probably Ludwig in drag. Well, we are here to tell you that you were right! The first give-away (no, not a trip, Xena) was that “Lois” immediately took up Ludwig’s usual place on the old Victrola.