Lucy misses her guy Riley, so Xena does her best to fill in. Since the temperature on Easter Day was almost 80 F/26C, Lucy and Xena did some front yard zoomies in the sunshine.
Category: Xena
Post-Easter Post
My brother Adam celebrated Easter with me and Lucy and Mommy and Daddy and Ludwig. Here is what the peeps ate.
As our guest, Ludwig was offered some, but he politely declined, saying he was not hungry.
Me and Lucy had deer burger and chicken livers and broccoli and some other yummy things.
Too soon, it was time to go back to work, and Ludwig went with us. He was worried about Mommy’s printer, which had been left unguarded since last Thursday. Who knows what could have happened to it without Ludwig there guarding it!
Ludwig, you look awfully tense.
My Prinzessin, your family’s hospitality was without reproach, and your castle magnificent; however, I must return to my duties, post-haste.
The T-Lex will have us there in less than half an hour, Ludwig. I’m sure everything will be ok. Try to relax.
It is true that I did not sleep well last night, I was so conflicted, fretting about the absence from my job while enjoying time with you, my love, my beautiful Xena.
Soon…
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz
15 minutes later…
*yawn* I’ve got my new rainbow bear Mommy gave me for Easter. Zzzzzz.
Frau Mommy’s printer is here and is well. I have not failed!
Frau Mommy: Where is my wastebasket? Who took my wastebasket? Has anyone seen my wastebasket? It was right here when we left on Thursday.
I’m sorry Mommy, but I don’t care where the stupid wastebasket is. Just give me whatever you were going to throw into it. And will you please tell Ludwig I kicked out Rainbow Bear so that he has room in my bed? I miss him.
I am Xena, the Schnauzer (sometimes Warrior) Princess alone in my bed.
Xena’s Visitor
Xena: Hi Ludwig. Why are you wearing my walking vest?
It is because Das Mommy has invited me home for Easter holiday.
Xena: Really? That’s great! You’ll get to meet my big sister Lucy and, and (quietly) you might like her…more than you like me… and then… No, no, Ludwig, you wouldn’t like it at my house at all! Not at all! Lucy might eat you. You’ve gotta tell Mommy you can’t come. 
But that would be rude, lovely Prinzessin. You must not ask me to do that.
A few minutes later…
Xena: So this is my car, Herr Ludwig. It’s name is T-Lex after my Angel Sister Lexi. It goes really fast, but you mustn’t be afraid. You can look out the windows and see other cars and people and buildings and all kinds of stuff.
This is fun, Prinzessin Xena. I would like to have a T-Lex also. It is wunderbar.
Xena: Ludwig, wake up! We’re almost home.
Xena: First the important stuff. This is the toy basket. Those are my toys. Understand? My toys.
I have no need of toys, beautiful Xena. After all, I have you.
Lucy: Who is your friend, Xena? Can I play with him?
Xena: No! Er, I mean, I’m showing Ludwig around, so please don’t bother us right now. Why don’t you go see if our supper is ready? And ask Mommy to set a place for Ludwig, too.
3 hours later… 
Xena: What am I gonna do, Lucy?
I don’t know, Xena. He’s your problem. You brought him home and told me to stay away from him. All I know is this is my bed and you can’t sleep here.
I am Xena, the Schnauzer Warrior Princess with nowhere to lay my head.
A Vet Visit and a Lesson on DNA HW Testing
Xena: How did you like your bath, Lucy? This is the first one I ever saw you get.
Lucy: It wasn’t bad, especially with Mom in the tub with me. And I want to be clean and smell good to go visit my friends at the vet’s. I even got a pretty scarf.
Lucy and Xena: Is it time to go yet, Mom?
Xena: Hey back there! Lucy! What are they going to do to us when we get there?
Lucy: Hmm, I think they’re going to pet us and give us treats.
40 minutes later
Lucy: Hi nice vet lady. What’s your name and where did they take my little sister? Tell the other nice lady to not give her treats. She gave me a treat and Mom yelled at her. Well, she didn’t exactly yell. But Mom told her I’m not allowed to have those kind ’cause of me being on the raw diet. I don’t want the other lady to get in trouble with my Mom.
Dr. Karen: Lucy, sweetheart, you don’t have to worry about Xena getting treats. We are taking a little bit of blood from her leg, just like we’re going to do with you. It doesn’t hurt much, just a quick pinch.
Lucy: Why are you stealing our blood?
Dr. Karen: Your Mom asked us to do a DNA Heartworm test. That way you don’t have to take heartworm prevention, because it lets us know even if there are tiny little baby heartworms in your blood. If there are, one shot will kill them. The difference between this and what’s called the occult test is the occult heartworm test only lets us know if the heartworms have grown up and are around your heart. Then it is hard and dangerous to kill them. So we are going to do this every 5 1/2 months to make sure you and your little sister are safe from the big bad heartworms.
A little later, after blood is drawn and bill is paid.
Lucy: Wasn’t that fun, Xena? We got new friends and we’re going home now. I lost over five pounds, too. I weigh 51 point 7 pounds. And I heard them say you are up to 15 pounds! You are getting to be a big girl, Xexe. 
Xena: They also squirted some medicine in my mouth (bordetella) and stuck another needle in my butt (3-year rabies). Yep. Fun. *sigh* I’m going to sleep now. Wake me when we get home.
Mom’s note: I started asking myself, “Why am I poisoning my dog every month?” And of course, my answer was so that she didn’t get heartworms, as well as fleas and ticks. Then I found out about DNA testing for heartworms. It catches any that are present while still in the early stages (microfilea), and they can easily be killed with one shot of ivermectin. The DNA HW test must be repeated every 5 1/2 months. The cost is also less or the same as monthly heartworm prevention, depending on what your dog weighs. I urge you to read about it here. There is also a recipe for all natural flea and tick prevention, as well as mosquito repellent, using essential oils.
I feel like I am slowly navigating my way through a “brave, new world,” defying all the traditional ways our veterinarians are taught to care for our dogs and cats, and learning new, safer ways to keep them safe; ways that my holistic vet wholly embraces. I feel very blessed and less alone to have Dr. Karen by my side on this new journey with my girls.
Xena Visits Adam
I love my brother Adam. He pets me real gently and holds me like I am breakable. He talks softly to me and tells me how good and how pretty I am. 
Mommy goes to visit him a couple of times a month. Sometimes I get to go, too. Once in a while Adam calls me Lexi, but that’s OK. Angel Lexi has told me how much she loved Adam, too.
Adam always wears his special leather jacket to see me. I made sure to wear my collar with the diamonds so that I looked extra good.
I’ve gotta go now. Mommy is taking us to get some lunch. I wonder what fine dining drive-through we will go to this time???
I am Xena the Schnauzer Warrior Prinzessin Princess with a brother
Ludwig’s New Friend
Prinzessin Xena… my love? Prinzessin? Ahhh, she sleeps soundly. Hmmm.
And shortly….
My new friend…what is your name?
Now I will not be lonely while I guard die Herrin’s printer.
Xena’s Big Adventure at Shamrock City
Hi, this is Lucy with another installment of Mom Grooming.
Xena: Wait! I want to tell about my adventures at Shamrock City on St. Patrick’s Day.
Lucy: So that’s where everyone went without me yesterday.
Xena: Yep, and I got poop-faced.
Lucy: Oh, no! Go ahead…I can’t wait to hear about this!
Xena: Te he, well, it started like this. Daddy is the Em Cee during the two weekends of Shamrock City and he teaches Irish folk dance, so he has to go. Mommy doesn’t usually go to Rock City in March ’cause it’s either cold or raining or both. But this year, it was a perfect day with sunshine and the temperature in the 70’s F. On the way up Lookout Mountain Mommy reminded me that I went to Rock City last October, right after my adoption. She said at first I was very scared of the band, but then I realized it wasn’t a monster chasing after me and I relaxed and enjoyed myself.
Mommy, everyone here is wearing green. Why didn’t you get me a St. Patty’s day shirt? Look! The band is getting ready to play!
Daddy said they are called the Olta Band and they all live in Chattanooga.
When the Olta Band went on break, Mommy and I (Mommy taught me that is the right way to say that instead of me and Mommy) anyhow me and Mommy and I walked around the park. I read some pee mail and also left some of my own. We saw this amazing green water fall…
…and a plaque that told about the married couple who started Rock City. Their names are Garnet and Frieda Carter. Click on the picture to read about that, but be sure to come back, ’cause I haven’t gotten to the good part yet.
Lucy: So, Xena, where’s the part where you got in trouble?
Xena: I didn’t get in trouble. And I’m getting to it. Be patient!
When we got back to the pavilion, scary Mr. Rocky was there. He tried to be nice to me, but jeepers creepers, wouldn’t you run if you saw him coming at you?
But then Mommy wanted to take our picture all together and I was in Daddy’s arm and I knew Daddy wouldn’t let anything bad happen, soooo…I decided to take this opportunity to check out Rocky’s big nose.
Lucy: So did you go get poop-faced to calm your nerves after that?
Xena: No! Will you pleeeease let me tell my story!?
I went to the patio outside the pavilion and relaxed while Mommy finished her Guinness Beer Float. These two came over to steal Mommy’s beer meet us .
The little girl is a miniature schnauzer, like me, only I think God gave her a double portion when he handed out ears. The big girl is half giant schnauzer and half standard poodle. I don’t remember their names or where they live. You see, I was concentrating on the cup in Mommy’s hand.
They finally left, and Mommy put down her “empty” cup and picked up her Fire tablet to read a book. She looked down when she heard a man behind her laughing.
I looked up too, but the cup was stuck on my face. Mommy got it off right away, ’cause she knows that can be very dangerous. At the time, I didn’t care, ’cause OMD, that Guinness flavored ice cream stuck to the insides of the cup was sooooo tasty!
Yep, that’s ice cream residue all over my face, and I couldn’t stop grinning.
So, Lucy, that’s why I want to tell my story today. Can you tell the grooming story another day? Please?
Lucy: Uh, yep. And now I know why you didn’t go to Shamrock City with Dad today.
This is Xena, the brave Schnauzer Warrior Princess taking a “rest” day at home.
Thursday is my Friday
Everyone talks about Friday being their last work day. Mine is Thursday. It’s a good day. I get to see some of my favorite people, and this week was special. On Wednesday, there was a meeting of lots of ladies and they ate lunch together in a big room upstairs. On the way to work, Mommy told me this was going to happen, and she explained how she expected me to behave. This was the first time I was around more than just a few people. I was a brave girl, and was nice to everyone. Mommy said she was very, very proud of me.
The whole thing was fun but exhausting, so after my lunch I needed to take a long rest with Mr. Hedgehog. Herr Ludwig came over to say hi, and then had to go back to guarding Mommy’s printer.
On Thursday, Mommy told me the same thing on the way to work, but that it was going to be a big group of nice pastors meeting in the church-instead of nice lady members-who all want to pet me. I went up to the pastors and wagged my tail and gave them my most adorable look. They all bought it thought I was pretty, and I got lots of attention. Later, Pastor Evelyn told Mommy that when they went into the big room called the sanctuary, I went as far as the door and didn’t go in. She said I was a very good girl. ( I remembered that Mommy told me not to go in there, so I guess I was a good girl.)
Thursday was sunny and warm, so, after everyone left, me and Mommy went outside for a while. I found that some other dog had been in my church yard and left his poop there. Mommy said, “Ick! Leave it.” The grass is full of interesting smells. 
Pretty soon it was time to go home, go for a walk, eat my supper, visit with Lucy, and go to bed. It’s been a very busy week.
I am Xena the Very Good Girl Schnauzer Warrior Princess
I Shopped at Walmart
On the way home from work, I got to go shopping at Walmart with Mommy. When we first parked, I didn’t know where we were. Then I saw the sign.
I started looking for where we would go into the store.
Then Mommy told me that someone else had already done the shopping for us, so I should watch for them to come out with a big rolling cart.
I saw a lot of cars going by and hoped the store person didn’t have to cross that dangerous traffic with my food.
Then I saw the door where people were coming and going, and figured that must be where all the good food came out, too.
Since I had to wait, I decided to check out lunch leftovers. Dang, nothing but an empty bag. Yep, lunch is why my beard looks like this, BOL! I think that’s my tummy I hear growling.
Look smart! Here they come! Mmmm, I hope there’s lots of goodies in there for me and Lucy.
Hey! Stop putting those in the trunk! Put those chickie wings in the back seat where I can eat them NOW. My Guardian Angel Lexi taught me that NOW is when I should get the things I want. It was part of her mantra.
I am Xena the Schnauzer Warrior Princess Walmart Shopper
Happy Birthday Madi
Today for Madi’s 16th Birthday Celebration, Mom will tell about how she learned to drive.
Xena: *yawn*
My Grandma was afraid to teach Mom, so she hired a professional driving teacher when Mom was 17. He said she was “a natural” and she passed her driving test the first time.
Xena: Seriously? People get paid to teach people how to drive? It just doesn’t look that hard. Push a stick here, turn a wheel there, move your feet around, and voilà, we are where we are going. Kind of sounds like a Dr. Seuss story, doesn’t it?
Don’t interrupt me, Xena. Where was I? Oh yes. Just a year or so sooner and Mom would have learned in the family ’54 Buick Century. The seats were blue, so Grandma called it Blue Belle. Grandma had to get another car because of all the salt on the roads to melt the snow. The salt killed that big, heavy car. Even its eyes fell in. This is a picture of what it looked like (credit to Mr. Google). 
Xena: No wonder Mommy doesn’t let us have much salt. Uh, Lucy, isn’t that Angel Lexi in the back seat? Was she with Mom way back then?
Um, I don’t think so, Xe. We’ll have to check with Mom about that.
Here’s a picture from January, 1960, of the actual car with my Grandma and her sister in front of the apartment where Mom grew up. 
Xena: Wait, Lucy. Who is that running from behind the bush?
*eyes wide* Let’s just keep going.
When Mom got a boyfriend…
Xena: Mommy got a boyfriend? Really? You’re fibbing, Luce. Mommy would never have a boyfriend. She’s married to Daddy.
When Mom got her first boyfriend a long time before she met Dad, he taught her how to drive something called a straight shift in his old Chevy Nova. We have another picture of what it looked like, courtesy again of Mr. Google. Mom says it was old and beat up and had red seats and didn’t look nearly that good.
Here’s the funny part. Her boyfriend lived out in the country with lots of woods. One part had a dirt track around it, so he showed Mom how to change gears and told her to just drive around the track. She got going too fast and forgot which foot to use for the brake ’cause there were now three pedals instead of two. This silly boy stood in the track waving his arms and yelling at her to stop. She didn’t want to run him over so she swerved into the woods and the car bumped over rocks and big sticks and barely missed trees until it finally stalled out on top of a log. A few days later, after he fixed his car, he took Mom into town and told her to drive his car around while he went into a store. The main road, State Street, was on a bit of a hill. Mom had stopped at a red light, and the car behind her kept running into her bumper. Finally, the man got out of his car and came up to Mom’s window. He explained that it was her drifting back into him, and did she have her foot on the break. She said no, just on the clutch. So that’s how Mom learned to drive a stick shift.
Xena: I think I will just learn to drive our T-Lex.
Our what?
Xena: Our T-Lex. That’s what Mommy named the car she bought for Angel Lexi before Lexi was an Angel. It’s a Toyota Lexus, hence T-Lex. Isn’t Mommy funny, he, he? How old do I have to be to drive?
I think 16 years old.
Xena: Oh. Well let’s just wish Madi of Madi and Mom a very, very happy 16th birthday, and happy driving!
Lots of love from Lucy, Xena and Mom
This is a blog hop, but since Mom isn’t smart enough can never get linked up properly, just hop over to Madi and Mom’s blog to leave your birthday wishes and hop along.
Baby Held
It’s Baby Hold time at work. And guess who the baby is.
I learned a new song and I’m going to sing it for all my friends:
I sing because I’m happy, I sing because I’m free,
For His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.
Did you like my song? I’ve got more where that came from.
Mmm. It feels so good to throw my head back and stre-e-e-etch.
Sleepy? Why do you think I’m *yawn* sleepy?
Mmm. Mommy hugs are *yawn* good too.
I am Xena, the Baby Held Schnauzer Princess …Warrior?
A Happy Ending or The Cruel Cut
I am so very happy to see you again my Prinzessin Xena.
Why are you back Ludwig. Didn’t Mommy tell you to stay away from me? Come any closer and I will bite your face again.
All the face-biting in the world will not keep me from you, beautiful one. If that is what I must endure to be close to you, then so sei es. You truly are a Warrior Prinzessin.
Well, I won’t be your girlfriend. I want to keep my options open. My Guardian Angel Lexi told me she was almost 12 years old before she got a boyfriend. She had her career to think about and couldn’t be distracted. She was a famous actress, you know. I might be famous at something someday too. And besides, how do I know it’s safe to be around you? You certainly haven’t been behaving yourself.
No need to worry about that any more, my lovely one. The Mommy had that problem “fixed.”
This is Xena the Schnauzer Warrior Princess with a safe new friend.
About Ludwig’s Visit
You know, Mommy, I like being with you.
I don’t know what brought that on, Xena, but I like you being with me, too.
Sometimes, though, it gets a little boring.
I know, but you just can’t stay by yourself with Ludwig while I am up in the balcony downloading Sunday’s audio.
Oh, no, I don’t want to. I think he wanted to take my temperature, and you know how I hate that. And why does he talk so funny?
He’s German, and he just moved here and…and what do you mean he wants to take your temperature!?
I don’t know, Mommy. Hey, what’s that on the floor? I think I’ll go check it out.
How about if you just stay put; I’m almost done. Then we may have to go have a little talk with Mr. Ludwig.
I’m never going to date a German!
I understand that bad experiences can make us feel like that. But there’s something you should know. *sigh* That’s exactly what I said to your Dad when we were dating. Do you know what he answered me?
No, Mommy, tell me! Did he say they are bad and you should never, ever date a German?
No, baby girl. He said he’s half German. *sigh*
Oh! I’m glad you dated Daddy. Maybe Ludwig isn’t so bad. Let’s go talk to him.
To be continued…
Ludwig Returns
Ludwig! What are you doing here?
I only wish to see you again, meine Prinzessin. I look longingly on your beautiful face. May I stay and speak with you?
Well, I guess that won’t hurt anything, especially since I’m done with my special big girl time.
I know this is true. I no longer smell that about you, Meine wunderschöne Prinzessin. *clears throat* It would make me so very happy to get a kiss. Just ein kleiner on my cheek?
Like that, Herr Ludwig?
Now what are you doing? Bear! Stop the scoundrel from getting in my bed!
Ludwig! How did you get over there so fast?
Please, meine Prinzessin Xena, I mean you no harm. Even a fierce bear cannot keep me from your love. I must kiss your sweet lips.
To be continued…
Xena’s Dr. Seussism
I awoke from my nap and saw these fishies swimming by in the air. I thought maybe I was supposed to catch my own lunch. And this odd hat was perched on my head. Then, suddenly, these words came out of my mouth. Mommy says I’ve been infected by Dr. Seuss. I hope I won’t need a shot.
I am Xena Schnauzer Dr. Seuss Warrior Princess
Our mayor Arty is hosting the party
So jump lickity split to the hilarious wit.
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This Is What You Do?
Mom: Xena, do you know anything about this? I leave you alone for two hours and this is what you do? I tried to be Kind by putting you in a nice big bathroom instead of in a kennel, and this is what you do?
How do you know I did that? Uh, Lucy might have gone in and chewed it after you let me out.
Maybe if you just left me free in the house with Lucy, things like that wouldn’t happen.
2 weeks later
Mom: Xena, you know I don’t leave you alone very often. I did what you asked and you were doing so well. Then, I leave you with Lucy and your sick Dad while I go to a class and this is what you do?
Uh, I was watching for you and, uh, oh boy, am I getting a time-out?
I am Xena the Schnauzer Princess Warrior in time-out
Grooming Annsley
Mom had a new groom today. She told me the story of how the nice lady found out about her grooming. Are you ready for this? The lady’s UPS delivery man told her! He saw her little tiny Yorkie and told her that his 15-year-old yorkie died not long ago. He said my Mom was a good groomer and gave her Mom’s name and phone number. (And boy, oh boy, did Annsley ever need groomed!)
Mom was concentrating when Annsley showed up and forgot to get her “before” picture, but she looked something like this (thanks for the pic, Mr. Google.)
She had big mats and little mats, and medium sized mats. But that’s nothing compared to Annsley’s story. When she was a little more than a year old she was rescued from a cage in a crack house. (I sure would hate to live in a house with cracks, too.) Other than to be made to have puppies, she had spent almost her entire short life in that cage. In the meantime, the nice lady had just lost both her parents. She had intended to get a yorkie, but with her tragic losses, she had forgotten all about it until a rescue person brought Annsley into the vet where the lady worked. Right then and there the lady fell in love with her and they have been together for three years now.
Anyhow, because of the cage she had to live in when she was so young, she would freak out about the metal cages at any groomer’s. She would shake so hard that the lady had to give her pills before taking her. Plus, the last groomer cut her skin in two places (and made her look bad by shaving the hair down the center of her nose).
After hearing the story, Mom remembered John the UPS man, who had told the nice lady about Mom. She remembered how John loved his tiny yorkie with all his heart. Mom thought maybe this was also a God-thing. Today, when Annsley came, she shook a tiny bit, but seemed like she wasn’t hardly scared at all. Mom had promised to not put her in a cage and that she would be the only pup in the grooming room. Annsley did great, even without any pills! When the lady…
(Xena) Lucy! Can I tell the rest, huh, please? I’m the one who got to play…oops, I think I gave the rest away.
(Lucy) Yep, you did. But the rest really is your story, so go ahead.
(Xena) Well, you see, the lady couldn’t come get her for about 87 minutes or hours (Mom: it was a half hour) so she said to go ahead and let her come upstairs and play with me and Lucy. Woo hoo!
Hi, I’m Annsley.
Hi, I’m Xena. Why do you keep running away from me?
I don’t know where I am and you’re bigger than me.
I won’t hurt you, I promise. Come on, let’s play.
Who’s that outside? That’s Lucy. She’s my sister and she’s wa-a-a-y bigger than you and me both. You don’t have to worry, she wouldn’t hurt you.
Well, I think I’ll just stay here until my Mom comes.
So that’s the story of how I almost got to play with a dog smaller than me. Maybe next time…she’s coming back in six weeks.
I am Xena the Schnauzer Warrior Play Puppy Princess
Let Me In
Hellooooo…anybody there? Will someone please open the door? I’m ready to come in.
Let. Me. In!
I am Xena the Schnauzer Warrior Princess, who finally got the staff to open the door for me.
Introducing Ludwig
Good day. I am Ludwig and I have come to live with Frau Amy and Fraulein Xena at this glorious cathedral of Heilige Luke. During the night when no one else is here I am guarding this valuable printing machine of Frau Amy. Today, however, I decided it was time to meet the little Prinzessin Xena.
Greetings, Prinzessin Xena. Herr Ludwig at your service.
Mommy! What or who is this?
But I told you, Fraulein, it is I, Ludwig.
Who are you really? Why do you talk funny? Why are you in my office? Sprechen!
You are even more beautiful from here, young Welpe. Ich liebe dich.
Come closer, lover boy….
…gotcha!
After a narrow rescue from a potentially deadly encounter, Ludwig has wisely determined it is best to admire the Frauline from afar.
*sigh*
I’m a Big Girl Now
I feel lousy.
Of all the humiliating things to happen in life…I’ve been “on my period” for over a week. It sucks. I hate my diapers.
Mommy says I am a big girl now, but these make me feel like a baby again. And not in a good way. I never had to wear these things when I was a baby.
Mommy got me what she calls “big girl panties.” I think that’s a fancy name for washable diapers. She has to safety pin them to my shirt so they don’t slide off. It’s ’cause I’ve got a stubby little tail like Angel Lexi, so there’s nothing to keep them in place but a pin and a prayer. Mommy even stuck me with the pin last night. Was it my fault I was moving around trying to see what she was doing? Now I know why she says, “Ow!” a lot when she changes me.
And to make things worse, I’ve had the squirts since Saturday. I feel lousy. I can’t make it outside in time so I have quit even trying. Then I have to get my bummie washed and a clean diapie on. And sometimes the nasty stuff squirts out of the diapy hole where my tail is supposed to be. It’s all very icky.
Since my period started, I don’t take my toys out to the hallway at work anymore. I don’t go to Miss Beth to get baby-held anymore. I don’t even play with Lucy anymore. I understand (sorta) that this misery will make the hormones do their job in making my bones good and other things like that. She says I only have a few more days of feeling down, of my emotions going crazy. I wonder if she has ever been through this.
Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess with Lucy and Chia 