Mom says I have to learn to not bark and growl when I am at work, or I am going to get fired!
When Will I Ever Learn
Tag: dog blog
Memory Monday Walk Down Puppy Lane
I am so glad Mommy has gotten better about taking pictures, because we could only find three pictures of me under one year of age.
The picture on the left was taken by the lady named Becky who had my doggie mom and dad. I was about 4 weeks old here. She put different colored collars on us puppies so she could tell us apart easier, and we were all Miss or Mr (plus color). It also helped prospective buyers who got pictures of us on the internet.
The picture with the German Shepherd. Now that’ one for posterity, isn’t it? I had this silly game where I grabbed Mr. Ara’s lip and pulled it out until he screamed. It was great fun. One day I decided to do an alligator roll with his lip between my pin-like puppy teeth. He wanted me to clearly understand what would happen if I did that again. I am a quick learner, and since my head is still attached to my body, you can see I learned that lesson the first time. Mommy took this picture to help me remember.
My peeps brother Andrew came to meet me on my first day in my furever home. He brought me this lion hand puppet. I had great fun with it for years. One of my peeps – usually Mom – would put her hand in it and I would attack it! I was only 8 weeks old in this picture.
Bonus picture: Mommy found Riley when he was six months old – or at least that’s how old the vet said he was. She didn’t know his taste in toys, so she bought him a variety. He liked the bone best. Unfortunately, that didn’t stop him from chewing up our bedspreads, dog beds, pillows, and blankets.
Therapizing at the Children’s Hospital
The last Thursday of every month Mom takes me to T.C. Thompson Children’s Hospital where I first meet up with one of my besties, Lois. I lead her to the play room to get my “start of therapy” treat.
Next, it is time to do my job. I have so many jobs – St. Luke, St. Timothy’s, T.C. Thompson – and I always remember what I am supposed to do at each one. At this job, I smile a lot and work on making the sick and hurting kids smile. I never, ever growl at anyone. You might say I am like a marine at the children’s hospital – the best that I can be. Today, Mom asked if she could take some pictures, and Miss Lois said some of the children’s families had signed releases, so if they said yes, it was ok. I hope my visit helped everyone to feel better. 
Afterwards, I am totally drained.
Bath time
I get cold after my bath. How about you?
New Treats
Mom disappeared for a while today – I mean, she left the house without me. She came back with something special just for me!
If you enlarge the picture by clicking on it and look at the red writing, you will see it says, “Live. Love. Treat.” Now that is my kind of treat!
I found the entire “bone” fit into my mouth. I tried to chew it up like that, but the task proved to be beyond even my abilities. I had to eject part of it from my mouth to swallow.
Mom insisted on taking my picture. I refused to look at her. That’s ok, take my picture, but never my treat!
The Groomed, Hard Working, Not-Really-a-Bad-Dog, Decorating Schnauzer for Sale. What!?!
I am sorry I have not posted lately. Mommy and I have been very busy. I hope you missed me!
First, grooming: Dad said, “Amy, wait until the end of March. The weather could change.” Does Mom listen to Dad? (You decide.) Mom grabbed me up early on a Tuesday morning before work and this is what happened before Dad could even sneeze.
Next, work: After I forgave Mom, I told her I would help her at work. It was a St. Luke day.
I got my computer work done and I moved into guard dog mode. One of the “Parents Day Out” workers and kids started to invade our office, so I growled. “No! Bad dog!” Mommy said. I hung my head and felt bad. Then they came back and oh my, I just couldn’t help myself, I did it again. This time Mom grabbed me by my beard (I hate it when she does that) and really scolded me. She said that lady was terrified of dogs and, after nine months, was just starting to warm up to me, and I go and act like that!
Next, decorating: Mom finally forgave me and let me help her decorate for Easter:
Now, selling: Dad gave Mom a whole bunch of old videos to sell. They mostly teach how to ballroom dance, but some teach how to do yoga, how to swim, and even how to do Irish dance! It took Mom a couple of weeks to list all these on ebay and Craig’s List, while I lay around staring pitifully at her. She’s finally done and starting to ship out the ones that have already sold.
I am Lexi, the groomed, hard working, not-really-a-bad-dog, decorating schnauzer for sale. What?! Oh, only if you can get $10 zillion for me, Mom? Well, maybe I am safe, just maybe.
Memory Monday – WOZ Crew in Pictures
This month for Memory Monday I thought I would mix it up with a picture collage. Isn’t that why we take pictures, anyhow, to remember? This one contains never before posted pictures of my first time as Toto in 2006. You can click on the collage to make it bigger and easier to see.
The top left picture is, of course, the Tin Man, the Scarecrow and the Lion. The Tin Man got mad at me once because I got away from Mom during his big scene, his solo performance, and danced back and forth across the stage with him. The audience was laughing when it wasn’t supposed to be funny. He may have forgiven me by now. I never had much interaction with the Scarecrow. A man made out of straw is liable to flop onto you at any time, so it is prudent to stay your distance. The Lion was my buddy. He carried me a lot, especially when things got a bit scary, like in the Wicked Witch’s castle. He didn’t even get mad the time I gently reached over and grabbed his nose between my teeth while I was in his arms on stage. It was just an affectionate nip, which, as a fellow animal, he seemed to understand.
In the top middle picture, that’s me in Dorothy’s arms, sandwiched between the two witches. I was fascinated by the wicked witch. She was scary mean when we were on stage, but so nice to me at other times. However, I managed to upset her once too. *sigh* She was sneaking across the back of the stage, supposedly unseen by Dorothy and company who were at the front of the stage. I ran off from Dorothy (which Toto was always doing in the movie) and started following and barking at her. She started waving her arm wildly at me to get away, which, again, got the audience laughing. I felt it was such a success that I included that in my performance every night. She never seemed to get used to it. *sigh*
The bottom left picture is of me and the costume person. I liked her because she never tried to put costumes on me. She said I was perfect the way I was. *big smile* Finally, the bottom middle picture is my brother Andrew, so proud of me after one of the performances!
This is Lexi Toto with lots of great memories!
T-Lex
After work Friday, Mom and I met Dad in a restaurant parking lot. I knew it was a restaurant by the smells. I thought, “Finally, the lawmakers have moved into the age of enlightenment and I can now partake of fine dining somewhere other than at home.” Sure, there’s always Mickey D’s takeout.
But even when you throw in an ice cream dessert for my birthday, it’s just not the same. I only know this because of the one and only time I was allowed to enter a real live restaurant. See https://lexitheschnauzer.wordpress.com/2012/03/03/oz-was-almost-real/.
But no, instead of us all going in the restaurant, Dad hopped in the car with us – and I was very glad to see him, despite the aforesaid disappointment. We drove to the local Toyota dealership to see a man about a car Mom found on the internet. Apparently, our Toyota Avalon is starting to fall apart and my peeps say it is too old (13 years) with too many miles (almost 300,000) to sink over $4,000 into it. Quite frankly, I would be glad to have another car since the air conditioning has totally stopped working in it and, with temperatures in the mid and high 60’s, I have been panting. Now, before you judge me as a spoiled lover of comfort, please remember that I am a black dog still wearing a winter coat. And I go to work with Mom almost every day.
The young fellow’s name was Curry (he,he), and he fussed over me a lot. He said his lab just crossed the rainbow bridge and he misses him a lot, but he is at work too many hour each day to start with another dog right now. I am glad I could help his need for canine contact. After Mom and Dad and I took the Lexus for a test drive, Mom told Curry we would all think about it and let him know the next day. I really didn’t understand this, since I could tell during the test drive that they really, really liked and wanted this car. It had everything on their “must have” list as well as their “would like” list”, and I could feel how excited they were. While we were saying goodbye to Curry, out of the blue Mom asked, “Did you go to see the Wizard of Oz at the Theatre Centre a few years back when you were a kid?” When he said he did, Mom pointed at me and said, “Meet Toto.” His eyes got so big and he shook his head like he didn’t believe it. Mom had to reassure him it was true, and he said that explained a lot about my perfect behavior. *smiles*
So, this is Sunday, and you can see where that car is parked today (Ok, maybe not. It is in our garage at home.)
Mom wanted to name my new car Lexi the Lexus. Dad said no. So now, since it is a Toyota Lexus, she has named it T-Lex. Bwahaha. Daddy thought that was only nominally better, but she has already told the car that T-Lex is it’s new name, and it is king (or queen) of the road! Yeah. I don’t think she can take that back.
I am Lexi the schnauzer in T-Lex.
Our Valiversary
Valentine + Anniversary = Valiversary.
That’s what my sweet Noodle and I have today. My crew worked really hard to come up with something special enough for my fantastic guy. Well, most of them did, anyway. I finally decided that anything short of the personal touch would not be enough, so I brought on some so-called experts. They wasted no time checking out different internet sites, did a search on “love” and found that women sometimes dance for their guys… and their guys like it.
After the crew did more research, there was a massive scrubbing of computers. I’m still not sure what happened. So…
I did my own dance for you, honey. Mom helped me dance while Dad recorded it for you. There were times I was dreaming of dancing alone, just for you. I hope you enjoy my personal present to you:. (Be sure to keep watching when the butterflies appear at the end!)
Valentine’s Preparations
Today we have all been hustling (he, he) (OK, tomorrow you will get my little joke) to prepare for the day of love. Mommy and Daddy helped me first thing this morning, and what fun we had! I sure wish I could tell you about it, but then it would ruin Noodle’s surprise. I’ve been in an extra-good mood all day from it, though. I had forgotten how much I like to d…oops, almost gave it away there!
While Dad was continuing to work on Noodle’s surprise, Mom started working on Daddy’s surprise. I helped by keeping Mom company and eating the stray apple peel.
We don’t know yet if it tastes good. We have to wait for Daddy to get home from his band gig, and Mommy says it will be so late that we may just eat it for breakfast!
Here’s the recipe if you want to give it a go.
Our Upcoming Valentine Anniversary
Dear Noodle,
I have been thinking for a while about what to do for you for our Valentine Anniversary. Yes, one year ago Sunday you asked me to be your Valentine, and I have been sweet on you ever since. Saying “yes” was a good decision. I thought and thought, and finally called on the crew to come up with some ideas. They all got on their computers to try to help me give you the best Valiversary ever.
I even recruited a poodle to help with the “oodle” side of you, as well as someone who looks like she is related to my friend Ella.
I have to hop off here for now to review the drafts before the conference call. I can’t wait for our Valiversary! Love and kisses!
Your girl, Lexi ❤
A Typical Day at Work
We went to work to the Church on the Mountain this morning. First things first:
In case you were wondering what is on my left foot in the first picture, here’s more of a close up. Oh, just a reminder, you can always click on a picture to make it bigger Mom is now making me wear a baby sock on the foot that had surgery so that I can’t lick it.
I hurried down the hallway to see my Auntie Carrie. Since she brings me both yummy treats and my very own special lunch, I have made her my official Auntie. She packs me a lunch with chicken, broccoli, carrots, and other yummy stuff that even Mom approves.
I always forget Auntie Carrie doesn’t work on Fridays. I resisted entering Mom and my office – which is in the next door – until I was positive Mom wouldn’t open Auntie Carrie’s door to give me one of the treats Carrie keeps for me. Mom, I can show you where they are!
I finally gave in when Mom filled my water bowl with my special water.
I decided to rest my eyes, but soon left work for dream land.
I tried to stay awake after that, but it was hard with the heater on in the office and no little munchkins running through the hallway today. The day care center is just past our office but is not open on Fridays.
While I was asleep, my Auntie Jen sent this to Mommy.
I’m Home from the Vet – Well, most of me is
This has definitely not been the best day of my life. First Dad refused to give me my brekkies. Then Mom left me at the vet office and I got stuck in a cage. Next, someone stuck a needle in my arm and stole my blood. Then the vet called my Mom. I was hoping Mom would say, “Oh, I will be right there to get my precious darling Lexi.” Nope. When the vet called her two more times, I started to get worried. That didn’t last long – it’s hard to worry when you are first sedated, then knocked out by something running into your vein. While I was asleep the doc stole five of my teeth – Five! In one of the phone calls, he had told Mom that “at my age” there could be bone loss leading to loose teeth, but he wouldn’t know until he got the plaque off. Even though they all felt firmly anchored, the plaque sometimes holds them in place. So why did he take the plaque off? Grrr. Ow, that hurt.
Remember that lump on my paw? Refresher here: https://lexitheschnauzer.wordpress.com/2016/01/31/potp-for-the-paw/ The doc found another lump between my paw pads on the same foot. Since it wasn’t directly beneath the lump on the top of my foot, he wasn’t sure if it was two separate tumors. He was concerned because the one on the top had grown so quickly. When the doc got in there with his knife he realized that the one on the bottom had pushed up the thin skin between my toes and caused the one on the top. Or something like that. When he got them off he saw that even though the skin on them was thick, the inside was filled with a creamy liquid. He told Mom on his fourth phone call that it was a good sign and didn’t recommend spending the money on a biopsy. Finally, Dad picked me up and brought me home to Mommy.
While Daddy went back out to get my pain medicine, Mommy held me and rocked me and sang me to sleep. You know I was in pain to let her do that. But it was strangely comforting. During that time, Dad sent Mom a text:
I can’t understand why he still isn’t home with my pain medicine!
My blood work was mostly good, but my liver enzymes were “off the chart” high. Mom told the doc that she had warned me not to drink. Ha, ha. Silly Mommy, I have already gone through the 4 step program for Kahlua and Cream.
Step 1: I ask for it.
Step 2: Mom says No.
Step 3: Mom and Dad start calling it “special K”, like I don’t know what they mean.
Step 4: They stop buying special K. Drat.
Mom asked for a copy of the bw:
Dr. Smith said this can be a sign of Cushings, but I had a Cushings test a year or two ago because those same levels were high then, and it came back negative. I don’t have any of what’s called “clinical signs,” either. To help my liver, Mommy bought Milk Thistle. Dr. Karen is my acupuncturist, and she said this will help bring the ALKP level down. I hope I get it in something good, like butter, or peanut butter or hamburger. Mmm.
Daddy’s home. Finally! Time to take my pain meds. I wonder what took him so long…
Memory Monday – Cat antics
Dear Friends,
I asked Mommy to run this for me while I am getting my teeth cleaned. I was shaking in the arms of the tech when Mom left…
It’s here again, friends, the first Monday of the month. This time I find myself thinking about the first time I found out that cats can be ok. I had never had much luck with them in the past. They either tried to kill me (Mom says I am a bit melodramatic with this) or got me in trouble by making me cross the street to chase them, or just scared me a lot. Let me tell you what happened to change my mind.
Mom went away and my BFF Auntie Jen picked me up to stay with her and her two schnauzers, Piper and Marley. Note: Marley no longer lives with Auntie Jen. I didn’t know there was going to be a cat involved! But, sure enough, there was a cat in her house, big as day. Not only that, Piper and Marley played with her. Can you believe it? When the cat started trying to get me to chase her for fun, I didn’t trust her. I have been tricked like that before, and it never ended well for me. (At this point in my story, please imagine me rubbing my nose with my paw, tears in my eyes.) This crazy cat was so persistent about it that I finally couldn’t help myself – I chased her. Then she chased me, but not mean-like. She was kind of laughing, in a cat way. Then she let me chase her some more. I liked this cat. I drew the line on cuddling with her like little Marley did. I did cuddle with Marley, though. Everyone cuddles with Marley.The last night I was there both my dog friends went to stay with their grandmother and I got to snuggle in bed all night with their Mom and Dad all by myself – no other dogs to take the attention I should be getting. I hoped Auntie Jen would come and get me again sometime. The next night I got to stay with my Grandma and sleep under the covers with her and eat toast and jam the next morning. I loved my Grandma.
I was Lexi, the cat-playing, snuggling schnauzer.
POTP for the Paw
Nothing much going on around here. Last Wednesday I had my acupuncture because my hip was starting to hurt again. Then Dad took me up the mountain so I could visit with Mom and have lunch with my friend Carrie. On the way home after work we stopped at another church where Mom and Dad are starting to go on Sundays. Daddy met us at the door and introduced me to Pastor Mark. Pastor Mark welcomed me into his office and told me to feel free to explore while he talked to my folks. After about an hour I knew it was past my suppertime so I started to remind Mom. I had to remind her loudly. She finally got the hint and we all headed home.
Thursday, before going to the children’s hospital, I stopped by work and got my treat from my friend Dave. Then I went on to the hospital, saw my friend Lois who always gives me a treat when I get there, and therapized some kids and nurses and a doctor or two. My friend Beth had a treat for me when I went back to work with Mom.
Friday, I really goofed up. I thought Mom wanted me to go downstairs to get groomed, so I kept running away from her. She finally gave up – and left without me! Later I found out that I had been invited to a birthday party!! I still can’t believe Mom went without me!! Happy birthday Jentry. I hope you had fun without me. I know it would have been better if I had been there. Oh, what, Mom? There was no food, not even cake? Well, I am sure Jentry had plenty of fun without me there.
This morning I got groomed. I knew I was picking up grooming vibes. Tomorrow is my teeth-cleaning-at-the vet day. They will do blood work first to make sure it is ok to help me go to sleep while they clean my teeth really good. The teeth cleaning has been scheduled for a while. Now I also have to have my paw checked. I have had a tiny pink lump on my front left paw for a long time. Mom caught me licking that paw last night and of course she had to stick her nose in and see why I was licking. This is what she saw:
You can’t tell real well from this picture, but it is a raised lump. By Mom’s reaction, I sure hope it isn’t anything bad. I sure hope I don’t end up having to wear a cone of shame. I sure hope I don’t lose my paw! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! POTP for me, please.
One Lovely Blog Award – for ME!
Woo hoo! Another award! I love awards. Like my Annie Award for being the best ever dog in a play (or something like that). And I love this award. It is so pretty. Thank you, Puppy Doc and Samantha at Musings of Puppy Doc. You are my newest friends.
Now, according to the rules (below) I have to share 7 facts about myself. Hmm, how can I limit this to only 7… he, he.
- I am a svelt 20.5 pounds because I lost 4.5 pounds over the last few months. Mom took away my canned food and topped my kibble with veggies!
- My most favorite thing in the whole world is acting on stage. I even got a special blue lucite award with my name on it (the Annie Award I mentioned above) for “Director’s Choice.” I could be on stage every night and never get tired of it.
- My second most favorite thing in the whole world is therapizing kids at the kid’s hospital. I only get to go once a month because there are so many dogs who like to do this, but I am the only smaller dog. I sit in the bed with the little ones, and grin the whole time I am there.
- Of course, my very, very most favorite thing in the whole world is treats. I get treats while I act and before I therapize. I get a go to the mailbox treat when I am home with Dad and a night night treat. My BFF Carrie brings me treats to work at St. Timothy’s and my new BFF Dave brings me a treat to work at St. Luke. And now my newest friend Beth brings me a treat on Thursdays to St Luke.
- I hate being groomed and I hate getting baths. Mom says I creep when I am on the groom table, and I should know better after 12 years of getting groomed every month. I still think I could creep right off that table one of these times.
- Even more than being groomed, I hate wearing clothes. I mean, I hate, hate, hate, hate, hate wearing clothes of any kind. When I was younger I would stand like a statue if Mom put clothes on me. She could pick me up and set me down somewhere else and my body would remain rigid like it was made of plaster. Now, I run around in spurts like a crazy dog. Run, freeze, run, freeze.
- I am not a cuddler or a huggie girl. I like my space. If I want pet I will let you know. I will continue to let you know until I feel you have pet me enough. Then you need to leave me alone. Don’t hug me. I let the sick kids at the hospital hug me, and my Auntie Jen, but that’s it. Don’t cuddle me. I will run away from you.
- Yes, I can count, but I have one more thing to tell you. Here it is: I am smart. Don’t try to pull anything over on me, ’cause it most likely won’t work. And if it does work, and I figure it out, I will pee in your bed, on your side of the bed. And you won’t know it until you are so tired you can barely stand up and you start to slide into bed and suddenly realize it is cold and wet and smells bad. Bwahaha!
Here are my nominees: (Noodle, dear, you have already been nominated, or you would have been first on my list, sweetie pie.)
Shoko and Kali of The Canadian Cats
Ray of A Dog’s Life? (Stories of me and him)
Rachel of rachelmankowitz
Belle, Bess and Bonnie of Three Pups and a Couple of Kitties
Sidney, Shelby and Sophie of corkscot
Dante of The Dante Diaries
Jasper and Nellie of jaspersdoggyworld
Kismet (you mean old bird, you) of kylascott
Sammie of Saving Sammie
The Fine Print for the Nominees:
1-Thank the person who nominated you and link their blog in the post.
2-Copy the rules and add the blog award badge as an image
3-Share 7 facts about yourself to your fellow bloggers.
4-Then nominate 15 people (I of course didn’t do this many ).
Breaking the Rules
My rule is No Hoodie. Mom’s rule is Stay Off the Driver. Mom broke my rule, so I broke hers. On the way to work this morning:
Operation Hoodie
When my peeps brothers were little, our Mom used to make a lot of their clothes. Often to match, sometimes for halloween. They were very young and didn’t know to protest.
I have seen Mom at the sewing machine from time to time, usually to make a repair, but never to torture me with clothes. We got a cold spell and out came my hoodie. Even though I lost weight, it was still a bit snug. Plus, since it pulls on over my head, I stand on my hind legs to get it off. With the hip dysplasia, that is no longer the best option. So Mom got an idea.
First, she used what she calls pinking shears to open up the belly of my hoodie. Poor hoodie. She used some material originally bought for another project, cut it to fit, sewed velcro onto it, then sewed it onto my poor hoodie.
Finally:
Then came the test drive:
New bed!
Mom got me a new dog bed as a belated Christmas present. Sheesh. Doesn’t she know all I want is treats. On the bright side, I did help pick it out at the pet store. After trying most of the beds there about 4 or 5 beds, I smiled when I sat down in this one. It’s a Martha Stewart original, with a reversible bottom cushion. I didn’t understand at first why she put it on the floor at the bottom of our bed. I wouldn’t go near it. Why would I sleep there when I have a queen size bed with lots of blankets?
This morning Mom said my bed at the Methodist Church – where we work two days a week – is too big and in the way, so this will be my new work bed. When she brought it into our office this morning I still wasn’t sold on the idea. I tried it but soon went and laid down in the spot nearer to Mom that I like best. Mom finally had the light bulb moment and moved the bed along the other wall, which was near to her, as well as more out of the way – of the door to the mini-fridge, that is!
I thought I had better try it out a little longer.
Zzzzzzz
What? No, I wasn’t sleeping on the job!
Phone Training
My first day back to work – Thursday – was a busy one. Dave remembered my treat, so the day definitely started off good. We were getting a new phone system and I had to supervise that. My minions the church volunteers gathered in the front office in the afternoon to be trained on the new phones. I paid close attention in case no one is around and I have to take a call.
Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess with Lucy and Chia 