Tag: jacksund

This Stupid Schmuck by Chia

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia19 Comments

This Stupid Schmuck by Chia

I got this far and now I’m stuck;
It’s all ’cause of this stupid schmuck.
He has a treat in his pocket;
If he falls then I’ll eat it.

Lucy: I read your poem, Chia….I still love you.
Chia: ‘Cause I’m such a good poet?
Lucy: No. But I am thankful that you’re not really on that table. And I’m thankful I got so many pats and scritches and sweet talk from the Al Anon folks yesterday!
Xena: I’m thankful I get to go to work with Mommy today. And I’m thankful I get to cuddle up with her under the bed covers every night. I love my Mommy and she loves me (best)!
Chia: I’m thankful for the nice weather and more walks! And I’m ignoring your (best) comment. (grrrr) Oh, and I almost forgot…big thanks and tail wags to Angel Brian, who is hosting Thankful Thursday, as well as Angel Sammy for the picture every week.

Chia, Lucy and Xena: The Ultimate Comfort Showdown

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia25 Comments

Hey Lucy, look at me. I’m the Princess of the Princess and the Pea. I’m on a big comforter and a blanket, too. The guest room is getting painted, so they got piled in this chair. Now I’m the Princess of Comfort.

Lucy: I’ll show you comfy, Chia. When we woke up this morning, Mom covered me up with my soft bed blanket. The bed quilt was partly over me, too.

So who’s the princess now?

Xena: Me, I’m Xena Schnauzer Warrior Princess. And I’m the Princess of comfort too!
Soon my royal attendant (Mommy) will brush my princess hair, wash my princess face, brush my princess teeth and take me somewhere in my royal carriage.

Who do you think is the Princess, folks? (I even have my very own pillow and red blanket to match my bed!)

A big thanks to  Comedy Plus for hosting Awww Mondays!

Chia’s Poem on Thankful Thursday

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia20 Comments

Chia: I’m thankful for Angel Brian, who is hosting Thankful Thursday, as well as Angel Sammy for the fun picture every week. Let’s see what Angel Sammy has in store for us today. Of course my poem – and picture – are added.

Office Cake by Chia

Sheri’s hoping that old guy, Bob, her boss,
Won’t try to reach over and grab her arse.
Connor is thinking this party is lame;
He wants to go play his video game.

Office dog Chia is eyeing the cake,
Planning the fast move she’s going to take.
Boss Bob is lost in his thoughts, diddle dee
And realizes he really must pee.

As Sheri decides to make a quick break
She sees bringing Chia was a big mistake.
Chia’s muzzle deep in the boss’s cake,
Boss Bob reaches over, a quick feel to take.

Now Bob’s in the ER, Sheri has no job.
Chi’s in the shelter with more office dogs.
This story’s lesson is easy to see:
Taking your dog to work doesn’t mean me!

Xena: Yep, we all knew that lesson, Chi girl, although that’s not the reason Mommy doesn’t take you to work. I’m still feeling thankful that Mommy is taking me! And I’m thankful for the 100% grass fed beef I got in my food dish today. And for the strawberries and butternut squash and cauliflower. *drool*

Lucy: I’m thankful I got to go to work on Wednesday this week. The Al Anon folks come in at noon. They all love me and pet me and tell me how special and how pretty and how sweet I am. *smiles*

Chia: I know, Xeboo, Mom doesn’t want me to run out the door when it opens. There’s a real busy street out there. I guess I’m thankful that Mom loves me so much… *whole body wags*
Well, thanks, everyone, for reading my poem and our thankfuls today. Don’t worry, be happy! (I heard that on a song.)

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia21 Comments

Lucy: I’m thankful for Angel Brian, who is hosting Thankful Thursday, as well as Angel Sammy for the fun picture every week. This week I’m also thankful that my little sister, Xena, handed over the controls to me to do the Thursday picture poem. As a thank you, I’ve included her in my poem!

When Pigs Dance by Lucy

I saw these baby piglets
And how my heart did swell
I knew the could be dancers;
That they could do it well.

My Mom got them their outfits,
My sis Xena taught them moves.
I gave them lots of loving
And moisturized their hooves.

Their very first performance
Took the audience by storm.
The crowd threw fruit and petals
So again they would perform.

In time they got much bigger,
And did not want to dance.
They moved out to a pig farm
Where they soon found romance.

Now they have their own piglets,
As cute as they can be.
Maybe some day they’ll learn to dance
And come to visit me.

I’m thankful I get to go to work with Mom regularly now. I was so happy to see Pastor today that I was jumping up and doing twists in the air. I got a new yummy treat from Thomas the Mailman. I was excited and started to walk away, but remembered to go back over to his truck to thank him. He liked that. And Mom brought my cookies, too. I got rewarded with one every time I went outside to go potty. That helped me realize that I had to go potty a lot!

Xena: Like Lucy, I’m thankful that I’ve been going to work with Mommy a lot more. And I’m even more thankful that she’s not making me wear those horrid “Big Girl Panties” at work. Oh, and I’m thankful that the weather has been getting warmer during the day, like in the 60’s F.

Chia: I’m thankful that I’ve had a few more walks around the neighborhood because of the nicer weather. (Mom’s a lightweight when it comes to walking in cold and wind. She says she doesn’t want to get sick.) And I’m thankful that Mom took me and Xeboo to practice our Freestyle last Sunday. I heard we’re going again this Sunday too! Woohoo!

With *wags & wiggles & hops* Lucy, Xeboo, er, Xena, and Chia

Chia on Happy Tuesday

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia26 Comments

Hey folks, I was the star at Freestyle practice on Sunday. Be sure to check the little box on the bottom right corner. That will give you a bigger view of the short video.

Did you see me? Did you see me back in a circle while standing on my hind legs? I am SO going to outdo Xena in Freestyle!

 Thanks to Miss Sandee at Comedy Plus for hosting Happy Tuesday Blog Hop! 

Chia and Xena’s Bedtime Challenges

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia24 Comments

Chia: Mom was having problems with Xena waking her during the night. Xena would start out the night in her little red bed in the bedroom. Sometime after Mom fell asleep, Xena would come over and ask Mom to pick her up into the bed. But she often backed away when Mom reached for her. Dad had a solution. Put the red bed in the big bed!

I loved that idea. It was the perfect place for me to sleep, even during the day.

And at night.

I only had one problem with this. I couldn’t sleep in the red bed and burrow under the covers.

So I gave Xena’s bed back to her so I could once again burrow. Now she starts out in her bed, then comes up next to Mom. She wakes Mom up to lift the covers for her. Diva!

 Thanks to  Comedy Plus for hosting Awww Mondays!

Freestyle Fun with Xena and Chia

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia32 Comments

We finally, after 87 months, went back to the Obedience Club of Chattanooga to work on our Freestyle. We had good news, too. Because I, Chia, had never titled (cause I just started) we could start as a brace at level 2B.
Xena: These folks might not know what a brace is, Chia, so I’ll explain. A brace is when there is one person (Mommy) with two dogs (me and Chia).
Chia: Well some of them might not know what Freestyle is either. I’ve head Mom explain it to people so many times that I’ve got that down. “clears throat” Freestyle is coordinated dancing between a person and a dog, where the dog has as much say in what happens as the person.” (I really like that last part!)
OK, now that we have all our definitions in place, I’ll continue. We were first told that we had to start at level 3.The reason that starting at 2B is a good thing is that we don’t have to do some of the more advanced moves and we can make our routine a whole minute shorter. And that means Mom’s aging brain can actually remember it, BOL!
Xena: That wasn’t nice, Chia.
Chia: I’m just repeating what I heard Mom say, Xena.

Xena: Ok, ok. What we’ve got to show you today is something fun. Miss Julia, our friend and trainer, presented a little challenge to everyone. She handed each person a slip of paper that had 2 words written on it…words that were opposites. Then the person had help their pup to illustrate those opposites with a short routine and everyone else was to guess what the words were. We were all given 10 minutes to work on it. Ours was fun and easy and made folks smile. See if you can guess what the two opposite words are. You know, like light and dark (not our words, so don’t guess that). The video is only about 14 seconds long, so be sure to watch, OK? And you might want to mute your device. There’s a distracting dog screaming in the background.

Can you guess our two opposite words?

Can you?

OK, you probably guessed. It’s two directions. Do you know which two? Let us know in your comments, and we’ll wag and tell you you’re right!!

Hey, thanks to Comedy Plus for hosting Awww Mondays!

Chia and the Bone

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia23 Comments

Hi! Hi! It’s me, Chia! I’ve got Mom helping me write this cause, well, someone stole and is working on the bone I stole and was working on. It’s one of Lucy’s birthday bones. In other words, someone stole my stolen bone!! How rude.

It started like this.

Hey, Luce the Deuce left her bone here.

Mmmm, it’s good but kinda dry. I need to go get a drink of water.

Oh no! I haven’t even got off the couch yet and my sis has moved into my territory. Xena! Get away from my bone that I stole from Lucy! Dog! She’s playing “deaf.” What to do…

Dear Lord, I pray, please give me back my bone that was Lucy’s bone and that Xena stole from me.

After two minutes of constant prayer and supplication, including whining and occasional growls…

My prayers were answered. I found Lucy’s other bone and it’s even better! Now Xena’s in a bone coma and I’ve got Lucy’s big knuckle bone.

Chia, who should be the Church Dog.

My Last Birthday Month Poem

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia27 Comments

I do hope Xena lets me do the poems more throughout the year. But this is my last one for January.

The Idjit and the Horse by Lucy

I saw that horsie coming and I squeezed my eyes shut tight
But she made it o’re that idjit with a clearance oh so slight.
Now I see this quarter horse not more than 14 hands.
After she jumps this idiot he may be no more a man.

Poor guy. I wonder if this is some kind of punishment. *sigh* I’m thankful my Mom never punishes me. I always try to be a good girl. Once in a while I have messed up and she has scolded me, so I’m also thankful that she forgives me almost right away, too.

Chia: I’m thankful all that cold white stuff is gone from our yard. And I’m thankful that I get to pick between Andrew and Mom for where I sleep at night.

Xena: I’m thankful for…I don’t know. It’s not been a great week. I messed up at church last week on the carpet in the chapel and Mommy stepped in it and well, things went downhill from there. I mean, she didn’t punish me or anything, but, well, I may not be going back. Or I may have to wear my big girl panties if I do. I don’t know which is worse. And I’ve been wanting to sleep on the couch where I’m already curled up on a soft blankie instead of getting up and going into the bedroom with Mommy. Then I get cold or scared or lonely and go pound on the door to get let in. I guess I should have learned by now to not wake up my Mommy. It doesn’t go well. Is this the kind of stuff that happens when you’re only four months away from turning eight years old?

Chia: Now I’m also thankful I’m not Xena. Maybe Mom will take me to work instead!

Xena: Yep, Chia, I heard Mommy talking about when she’s going to take you.

Chia: When? Tell me! *wags*

Xena: When H-E-double hockey sticks freezes over. But she didn’t spell it, she said the word.

Lucy: I think (hope) that’s all we’ve got for today. Before we go, I want to thank  Angel Sammy for the fun picture and, as always, I’m thankful for Angel Brian, who does such a great job at hosting Thankful Thursday. 

Lucy with Thankful Thursday Poem

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia23 Comments

This is Lucy back again on my birthday month, having fun with a picture by Angel Sammy And, as always I’m thankful for Angel Brian, who does such a great job at hosting Thankful Thursday. Here’s the picture for this week:

The Pool and the Cool Hound by Lucy

The game got cancelled, so what can we do?
How ’bout something different, something new?
There’s a new kiddie pool in the back yard.
So they stripped to their shorts with disregard
For children or pets who might be around.
They said, “Look! That pups laughing! What a cool hound.”

OK, so I don’t actually have “hound” in me. I’m 1/3 AmStaff, 1/3Pit Bull, and 1/3 Boxer. My Mom says that’s a really great mix, and I’m proof of it. *wags and full teeth smiles* But I’m thankful I got to do the poem again this week. And I’m thankful the snow has gone away, too.

Chia: I’m thankful Mom took us to the dog park last Friday. And she didn’t yell at me even one time to stop pulling.

You can see that there was still snow and mush on some parts of the walkway. And wow, look at Lucy’s crazy shadow! I’m thankful that dog isn’t coming after me. Hey Luce, why did you kinda hang back so much? Mom was being super nice with her soft voice on the whole walk and didn’t even try to slow me down.

Lucy: I guess cause she kept wanting me to cross in front of her instead of behind her. I was just trying to be polite. But she said I was going to knock her down with the leash pulling against the back of her legs. I felt bad I almost knocked her down, so I stayed back behind her.

Chia: Next time, Luce the Deuce, just do what she says. She had to keep gently saying, “Come on Lucy, hurry up Lucy, come on up front with us, Lucy.” Although, come to think of it, that did take the focus off me.

Xena: Yeh, Lucy, why can’t you and Chia just be perfect walking companions like me? *wags* My turn for a thankful. I am thankful that I am a perfect walking companion for my Mommy, and don’t pull on the leash or lag behind! Once in a while I stop to sniff, but that’s just my natural curiosity, and Mommy understands that.

Lucy and Chia: Phhthhhhh!

Lucy, Chia and Xena the Perfect Walking Companion wishing you a Happy and Thankful Thursday!

Lucy and Snow

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia19 Comments

*shiver* I’m just thinking about how cold that snow is that I have to walk in to go potty! It started right on time at eight o’clock this morning. After about an hour Mom took me and Xena out to do our busyness in the front yard.

You can see there wasn’t much snow, but neither of us would go walking in it to do what we needed to do! A little while later Mom suited up Chia and out we went again.

None of us still would go far enough in it to do our busyness. Chia wouldn’t even come off the top step, not even to run down and say hi to the neighbor folks walking their Jack Russel mix. This is Chia’s first snow!

A few hours later there were three or four inches of snow on the ground.

I finally made the snow yellow. I know this isn’t a big deal to most of our friends. But we haven’t had any snow since Chia came to live with us three years ago. Our driveway, as you can see, is downhill, and the exit from our subdivision is downhill too, where you have to turn right or the other direction on a busy two lane highway. So pretty much no one goes anywhere when it’s like this, and most businesses close. Even Mom and Dad’s monthly dance cancelled for tonight — not that they were venturing out in this anyhow!

Chia found bare ground under the living room’s overhang and she did what she had to there.
I finally said enough is enough. I want to go in the house and curl up somewhere warm and without this cold, wet, white stuff.

I fell on my face coming up those snowy stairs. That’s why I have snow on my nose! Don’t worry, though, I’m OK.

Hoping all y’all are safe and happy. And thanks to Rosy and Sunny of The LLB Life for hosting this snowy Nature Friday!

Love, Lucy, the birthday month girl!

The Case Finale

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia8 Comments

In case you missed any of this suspenseful series, you can click on these links to catch up: In order –
Ludwig’s Injuries
Ludwig’s Funeral
Xena’s Close Call
The Trial
Ludwig and the Court Case
Startling Trial Revelations
A Surprise in Bavaria

In Shanaya’s home:

Chia: Come on, you guys, stop backing away from me.

Shanaya, I know you’re a ninja or blackbelt or something else totally pawsome. But I can run faster than you. Besides, I didn’t come here to hurt anyone. Quite the opposite! Sissie, I had to clear things up between us. I need you to know that I didn’t put that pillow on your head. I’m telling the truth. I would never ever hurt you, at least not on purpose. You’re my sister and, well, uh, it’s hard for me to say, but… I love you. You’re part of my pack, an important part, and well, geez this is hard to say…you’re my sister. Please come home with me.

Xena: *sob and happy wags* I love you too! Let’s go home
Chia: You can stop hugging me now.

Back in court…

Xena: Judge Lucy, please don’t put Chia in jail! She’s my sister and I need her.
Chia: You can stop hugging me now, Xena.
Judge Lucy: Chia, you admitted guilt on deading- or at least attempting to deadie – Ludwig. Even though Ludwig will never be the same, he has sent word that he does not want to see you prosecuted. He understands it’s just in a dog’s nature. Admitting what you did even in the face of consequences was a growth moment in itself for you.
There was no proof in attempted stuffie deading of two other stuffies.
Xena believes that you love her and didn’t try to hurt her. She thinks she may have twisted around in her sleep and the pillow fell over her face.

Chia: So what’s the bottom line, Judge Judy, er, Lucy?

Judge Lucy: 1. On charges of attempted first degree stuffie deading: guilty and pardoned. 2. On charges of attempted stuffie deading: charges dropped. 3. On charges of attempted murder of your sister: not guilty. Case dismissed.
Chia: Let the whole world rejoice! (Well, at least all my friends!)

Peace on earth, good will toward men and dogs and stuffies.

Chia: Xena, we’re home. You can stop hugging me now.

The end.

Chia’s Nails and Dance Hopes on Sunday Selfie

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia25 Comments

Thanks to The Cat on My Head for hosting Sunday selfies. 

Chia: Hey Miss Jentry, I’m so waggin’ glad you came over to stay with us last night. I like snuggling up with you to sleep. And all that food you cooked today smelled so yummy! *whole body wags*

Miss Jentry: I love you too, Chia, and I know what you’re trying to do. But your Mom said not to give you any of it.

Chia: Well, in that case, I’m gonna go with my Dad. After all, I wanna show off my pretty new nail polish!

Chia: Dad’s going to play his horn with the big band at a private party. They’ll think I’m so cute they’ll let me in, and I know how to dance, you know. I learned freestyle dancing from Mom and Xena.

Hey Dad, you look really nice. So do I. Miss Jentry gave me a bath and painted my nails like candy canes. I wanna go to the dance with you. *whole body wags* I’m ready to go! Let’s go! Let’s go!

Dad Jeff: Uh, Amy, did you tell Chia she could go with me? She’s even got her harness on to go.

Mom Amy: Nope. It was all her idea. Good luck dissuading her.

Startling Trial Revelations

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia24 Comments

Judge Lucy: Since we do not have a state or local prosecutor, I will show the next piece of evidence. Chia, you were caught on video attacking and deading Ludwig. President Larry Lemur, please show us the videos.

President Larry Lemur: Your Honor Lucy and animals and stuffies of the court, do any of you dispute that the dog in this video is our defendant, Chia? If so, speak or woof now. *prolonged silence*
I believe you can clearly see what Chia was doing when she thought she was not being watched.

Next is the video of when she realized she had been filmed during her crime against a stuffie, and this is where she tried to cover it up by stating that she had found Ludwig torn apart like this, with his stuffing hanging out.

Judge Lucy: Defendant Chia, I will give you one more chance to try to redeem yourself by entering a different plea.

Chia: But, but…I thought no one saw and then it wouldn’t count. And hey! You said this is a mock trial!! What about that!

Judge Lucy: Yes, we had set it up that way until the hard evidence of these two videos appeared in my email from an anonymous source.

meanwhile…

Xexe in Hospital Room in Bavaria: I’ll be right here with you, Ludwig. I’m going to try to get a little shut-eye in this chair the kind nurse had brought in for me, but just say my name – either of my names – and I’ll help you with whatever you need.

Ludwig: You are still my love, XeXe or Xena or whatever lovely moniker you wish for me to call you. After all, a rose by any other name is still a rose, and you, my Xena Schnauzer, by any other name, are still my love. Your beautiful face is always in my heart and will live in my soul forever, and…

Xexe: *snore*

*back at the courtroom*

Chia: Dogs and Stuffies of the jury! Yes! Yes! I deadied the stuffie!! It was me! I had fun doing it and I will do it again! It’s. Just. A. Stuffie!!

*Stunned silence while Chia turns and runs out of the courtroom.*

Chia’s Happy Tuesday

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia33 Comments

Hi friends!! *whole body wags* Miss Jentry came over last weekend and I’m always so excited to see her!!!!! She let me (just me) come out on the back porch with her and Andrew and baby-held me like Daddy does. Then she did something that I never had done before…she put color on my nails! And it wasn’t scary like when they get cut or dremeled either!

I feel beautiful.

Look, she even painted my dewclaws! Now I’m a pretty girl, just like Miss Jentry. *big wags*

Lots of thanks to Miss Sandee at Comedy Plus for hosting Happy Tuesday Blog Hop! 

Chia’s Thankful Thursday Poetry

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia15 Comments

Can you believe my sis Xena gave the OK for me to do the poetry again this week!? Let’s do it and have some fun with it! But first, thanks to Angel Brian who is hosting Thankful Thursday, as well as Angel Sammy for the fun picture every week. 

My Food Fridge Crisis by Chia

“My food fridge has been stolen!”
I gasped between bites of supper.
Now I feel
Sad and and real…angry.
Do I eat or do I chase?

“I’ve called the cops,”
My sweet sister woofed.
It is finished.
The thieves interned,
The fridge returned.

O Happy day! My body wagged.
Joyful running between bites of breakfast.
Now I feel
Happy and real…thankful
Do I play or finally sleep?

Lucy and Xena: *applause, applause, applause* Great job, Chia! You took a chance on a different kind of poetry and it worked! And we’re both thankful that our fridge wasn’t really stolen.

Chia: Gee, thanks! I don’t think y’all have ever complimented me before! I’m thankful that we’ve had pretty weather and gone on lots of walks, even at the greenway!

Mom Amy: And I’m thankful that I have vacation time to use between now and the end of the year and can take off more days to spend with you precious girls! Now, how about another walk?

Thankful Thursday with Halloween Poetry

Published on by Xena, Lucy and Chia27 Comments

First, thanks to Angel Brian who is hosting Thankful Thursday as well as Angel Sammy for the fun picture every week. 

Xena: Chia asked to do the poetry this week, so, since I’m a good sister, I said ok.

The Halloween Disguise by Chia

It’s the No Clue Dog Clan
To do the worst they can.
Disguised on All Saints’ Eve
Dressed up just to deceive.

“Let me at em!” Chia growls,
Or they’ll rip out that cat’s bowels.
Ri! Bark real loud and roar!
The cat will lock the door.”

“Then run fast!” whispered Luce.
The cat yelled, “Bones for truce!”
The three sat up and begged,
But later that house egged!

I was going to say I am thankful Mom didn’t embarrass me for Halloween like she did a couple of years ago:

2022 – How embarrassing!

But then this happened:

How humiliating!

She even faded the background to make me stand out more! She’s been calling me Sausage, as in “Come here, little sausage.” Grrrr. I give her a dirty look every time she does it. I mean, she’s starving me and I still put on another 1.5 pounds. Yep I went from 15 pounds to 21.5 pounds! (Riley’s food sure is tasty!!)

Xena: I’m thankful I’ve stayed nice and slender…although I’d rather get more food! And I’m thankful Mom took the day off work today so I didn’t have to dress up as a skunk…or a vampire dog!

I’ve already done that. Here’s a couple of throwbacks.

I’ve come to suck the blood out of all your steaks! Vampire Xena

Our first vampire on All Hallows Eve was our Angel Lexi. She popped into a party some of her friends back here on earth were having. She said,”“I am back for the party ’cause there are so many good food things and all my friends are gathered together in one place, but please don’t think I turned into a vampire dog when I died. I am not really a vampire! It is just a really great look for All Hallow’s Eve! Bwahahahaha – I have come to suck your blood. (barked in Transylvanian accent, of course)”

Hmmm. It seems like there is something just wrong about the title Angel Vampire, don’t you think? Happy All Hallows Eve, my sweet angel girl and to all our friends out there in Blogville.