
Smiles, hops, skips and wiggles from Lucy and Xena the Schnauzer Warrior Princess

Smiles, hops, skips and wiggles from Lucy and Xena the Schnauzer Warrior Princess

Hi Lucy.
Come closer. I want to tell you something.

*Whack! Whack! Whack! Whack!

Hey! Leggo my leg!

Why are you being like this, Xena?

I’m bored. Turn your head that way, Lucy. I want to tell you something else.
Whack me once, shame on you. Whack me twice, shame on me.

OK then, I’ll lay paws on you and pray for you to recover from your recent whacking. I am the church puppy, you know.
Love and Wiggles from “the abused patient what have I done to deserve this big sister Lucy
And from me, Xena, the Schnauzer Warrior Princess

Lucy: Hey Xena, Mom said if we were good dogs, we might each get a new Bully Horn for Christmas! And some new used stuffies, too!

Xena: Yay! I want a bully horn! And new stuffies! Wait, what’s Christmas?
Lucy: This will be my first Christmas with Mom and Dad, too. I hear that Christmas is a magical time of the year when all your wishes come true. And some believe that if you listen closely, you can hear the animals talk.
Xena: But we talk all the time!
Lucy: I know that, but some people don’t hear us. Maybe it is Christmas Eve when they realize that we are as real as them, with feelings and thoughts and need the same kind of love and care as them.
Xena: Hmm. I will have to think about that after lunch. Hey Lucy, did I tell you what a fun time I had at Rocktoberfest with Mom and Dad? I wish you could have been there.

Lucy: Maybe next year I won’t be so afraid of things and can go, too. I know it helped you get over some of your fears.
Xena: I’m not afraid. I’m a Warrior Princess! And I can eat chickie feet with the best of them! For some strange reason, Mommy took this picture for Halloween, but she didn’t get it on our blog.

Lucy: Yes, pretty scary. *grin* Say, I heard you are going to Angel Lexi’s vet today. Mom is taking you to Dr. Karen to get a leap tow shot.

Xena: Yep, and I won’t be afraid, either. She’s something called whole is tick. I hope I don’t get any ticks from her. I can already leap, but I have never had to tow anything. I heard Mommy talking to Dr. Karen on the phone, and she and Mommy see things the same way and won’t argue. Mommy will protect me and say, “No,” if they try to put that glass stick up my bee hind again.
Lucy: Do you realize that none of that made any sense?
Xena: Pthhh.
I am Xena, the senselessly brave Schnauzer Warrior Princess
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Lucy: OK, so first, I want to thank everyone for their support. No one told me I was a bad dog for running off. Ya’ll just told me how pretty I am and to be patient and don’t make my Mom worry about me ’cause she loves me very much.
Xena: Well, it’s true, except for the part of not being a bad dog for running off.
Lucy: I wasn’t talking to you, Xena. I was talking to all my friends who love me. Some day you will love me, too, because I am going to be a wonderful big sister to you. I remember now what it was like coming to a place – even a good place – that was all new and trying to learn what to do.
Xena: You rolled me in the dog lot today. That wasn’t nice. You scared me.
Lucy: I was trying to play with you. I will be more careful next time.
Xena: Mommy got a brand new toy just for me. His name is Racoon. I love Racoon.

Lucy: I am glad you love Racoon, Xena. Mom spent Saturday going to the half off sale at all the area Goodwills. The toys are for all of us. And I got a “new” collar.
Xena: What about my tennis ball?

Lucy: Again, the toys belong to all of us, little sister. Mom threw the ball for you a lot, and you learned it is called “ball.” That was good, Xena.

Then, Mom made sure I had a turn to play, too. She wanted me to remember that she loves me just as much as she loves you, and that we can still have fun together.

Did you know that we stood and watched you play by yourself and do zoomies? I bet you didn’t see Mom look over and smile and wink at me. Do you know what I did then, Xena?
Xena: Did you ask for a treat?
Lucy: No, I winked back!
Xena: No way! I think you’re fibbing, Lucy.
Lucy: Way! You should have seen her mouth drop open before she grinned real big.
Xena: Then Mommy and Daddy took us all – even Riley who mostly ignores me – for a walk. Mommy forgot to bring the camera phone to take my picture. She didn’t realize she needed that picture until after we got home and she went into the bathroom.
Lucy: Xena! You didn’t!
Xena: At least I went to the bathroom in the bathroom. Hey did you see my new cuteness collar? That must have been what kept me out of trouble.
Lucy: The way you acted on the walk, she probably couldn’t have gotten your picture anyhow. You bunny hopped down the road and barked and barked and zigged and zagged and totally wore yourself out.
Xena: *yawn* No I didn’t.

Lucy: Shhh. Goodnight, little sister.
Love and wiggles, Lucy

Hi. My name is Lucy and I am a runaway. It’s because I have a problem. Her name is Xena.
There, I have admitted it. That is the first step, right? You see, I never ran off from my home until Mommy brought home the cute puppy. Yep, that’s what everyone calls her. Oh, what a cute puppy. Do you have any idea how much I want to stop up my ears every time I hear that? She has ruined my life. I never get time with my Mom and Dad. Well…almost never.
One day not long ago Andrew took me and Riley outside to play. The first thing I did when Andrew looked away was to run off through the woods with Riley, and let Riley take the fall for it. It was easy to get him blamed for corrupting me. After all, I had never run off before.
Sure, they let me sleep in the bed with them now, but I know it’s just because they feel guilty about letting the cute puppy sleep there. They don’t have me fooled.

I was cold, so Mom covered me up and I slept with my head on her pillow.

But the brat the cute puppy got her spot on the bed too!
I just get so sick of Xena taking all my stuff. And she never gets in trouble for it, either.

Mom was with us the next time that we were all in the back yard, outside the fence. I saw her look down at her phone and I took my chance. Riley had just gotten a lecture about not running off, and he told me he was staying put. So I took off into the woods behind the house by myself and Xena followed me. I didn’t really mean to take her. I didn’t want her around me at all. So I sent her back and she was waiting by the fence when Mom came running from scouring the front yard and the woods looking for us. I waited just a bit to see if Mom even cared that I was still gone. When I saw her running around asking everybody if they had seen me, I decided to come back home too.
Yesterday I saw a rabbit and sped off after it. Is it my fault that Riley followed me? Andrew came running after us, but we just kept going. After running and running, we wandered into the yard of a nice family with little kids, and we had a great time playing with them. I had managed to shed my collar with all ID, but Riley still had his on. Two hours later, while Mom was at work, she got a call from the mail lady saying she had seen us in a neighborhood on the other side of a very busy two lane highway. Mom left right away and had gotten as far as our subdivision when she got a call from the man whose house we were at. I wouldn’t go to her. I figured I was in trouble and this would be a nice family to stay with. I mean, why does she need me anymore, anyhow? She has the cute puppy now. Right? Well, she got me into the truck and I jumped back out. The nice man helped Mom by lifting me back into the truck, then lifting in Riley. Then he had to take the cute puppy off of Mom’s back – yes, really, the little thing is like a monkey – before Mom could stand up.
I think the next step is to believe that a power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity. I sure hope so. In the meantime, I am grounded. No more off-leash time outside of the fence or house. Oh, and did I already mention that yesterday I lost my pretty red collar with my rabies and name tags? *sigh*

Love with no wiggles, Lucy

Hey Lucy, do you think Daddy knows what we did today?

Xena! Shh. I haven’t heard Mom tell him that I ran off in the woods and took you with me. I think she’s still recovering from the fright. Just look innocent.

Is this innocent enough?

Hi my friends. It’s Lucy, your favorite pup (in this home). Mom got some new dogs in to groom, and I get to tell you about them. This first one is Scooter. Scooter is a 9-year-old multi-poo. That is a maltese mixed with a poodle. I guess you could also say he is a pootese, he, he. He belongs to some friends of my peeps brother, Andrew. Scooter cries and screams, but he doesn’t try to bite. Mom just needs to get ear protectors. Heck, we all need ear protectors with Xena around. Scooter was covered with fleas and flea dirt, and his hair was a bit matted. He got 3 – yes three – baths while he was here. I’m lucky to make it through one bath.

Scooter had bad teeth, so his Mom, Beth, took him to the doggie dentist and they pulled about 12 of his teeth. They wanted to pull a bunch more, but his Mom said, “No.” Beth called my Mom to see what she thought. Mom said she could go to a different dogtor to get another opinion. Isn’t my Mom smart?
This next pup is named Maggie. Maggie is a 2 (almost 3) year old – wait! I just watched Xena bark at Riley and chase him out of “his” chair in the library. He’s like 87 gazillion times bigger than her! Dad warned us she would take over the house.
Anyhow, where was I? Oh yes, Maggie. Maggie is a poodle/shih tzu mix. Mom said she could have tons of fun with the names for that combination, but it’s best to leave it up to your imagination. Maggie was very good on the grooming table and has a sweet personality, kind of like me! She was matted to the max, and the lady did not want her shaved. Mom worked and worked on her, using her best grooming tricks and tools to get out all the mats, until Maggie looked as sweet as she was.

In closing, I remember the days before a certain schnauzer puppy took over.

Our feet and tummies and Mom’s flip flops were all safe. Life seemed much simpler back then. It seems so long ago…
Love and wiggles, Lucy.

Lucy: Xena, you get all the attention.

Xena: I don’t know what you mean. You get fed.

Lucy: Yeah, but you get all the other attention.
Xena: But I see our folks pet you and tell you that you’re a good girl.
Lucy: Uh huh. But I know that even then they are thinking about you.
Xena: I don’t know why.

Lucy: And she buys you new toys.
Xena: My giant ducky isn’t new. It came from a yard sale.
Lucy: *sigh* Exactly! Did you see me get anything from the yard sale?

Lucy: Now I’m the middle child. *sigh*
Love and wiggles, Lucy

Hi, it’s me, Lucy. I hope you haven’t forgotten me. I was wondering if I would ever get to write on my our blog again. Tonight will make one whole entire week that Xena has been my sister, and a new puppy in the house changes everything. I didn’t know what to think when I first met the puppy, so I ran into Dad’s office where all the good pondering and calming gets done. Mom said I was scared. Doesn’t she know I run into the closet – not the office – when I am scared? Anyhoo, after I thought about this puppy thing for awhile I decided I would see if she would be a good toy playmate. I found her in the bathroom with Mom and plopped down into the play position. Nope, she just hid, shaking, behind Mom’s legs. Things kinda’ just kept going like that all week. Sometimes Mom would give me Xena’s food bowl to finish up her kale and whatever else she didn’t want. Just as I would lean in to take a bite Xena would run over and stick her head in the bowl, acting like she wanted it. I would stand back and wait, like a good bully girl. Thinking she had won, she would walk away, and I would clean up her leftovers. Other times when I tried to play with her she actually growled at me. Can you believe that? So I would just go over to Riley and get him to play with me. All week I tried really hard, and nothing seemed to change.
Finally, last night, Mom and Dad dropped onto the couch, exhausted, in front of the TV to watch a silly Netflix show. (Mommy said to tell you she really does have on blue jean shorts; they just got covered up with her hoodie and us.) Maybe it was just because we were all relaxed together, something magical seemed to happen.

Love and wiggles, Lucy
Note from the whole household: You have been seeing Xena’s new header by Annette (A Dog Tales), who is a graphic artist extraordinaire. Again, a very special thanks to her for the beautiful and delightful headers of Lucy and our dearest Angel Lexi.
Thanks to Mia the Pibble for including Lucy in her great Black Dog Day post!
It’s October 1st and that means it’s National Black Dog day! What a great pet holiday to bring awareness to all the black dogs out there and help break the stereotype!

Why on earth would black dogs have their own holiday you ask? Did you know that black dogs are one of the hardest dogs to find homes for? It’s true! On top of that..if you’re a black dog and a bully breed (or any breed considered “dangerous”) finding a forever home could be an impossible mission!

Reasons for potential adopters overlooking black dogs could be superstitions, negative labels or fear. Lots of humans are scared of me when they see me walking in the off leash trails or even on the street when I am on leash! They look at me like I am going to jump up and attack them (maybe with kisses!..). I don’t know why anyone…
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Dad was in his spot on the couch, cuing up some funny SNL videos from You Tube. Riley took Mom’s spot. Then I took my regular spot. Then Mom squeezed in sat next to Dad. That made it so I could touch everybody all at the same time.

I was so happy I had to give Mom lots of kissies.

Subscript from Riley: “I was here first. Stop touching me. Fine, I’ll go lay on the rug.”
It was still a good evening.
Love and wiggles, Lucy
Mom bought pork ribs and froze them for two weeks to make them safe for me to eat. They are ready now, and what do we eat with pork? Sauerkraut! I tried it for the first time this week and all I can woof is YUM! (I had an apple core, too, but I ate that from Mom’s hand as my appie tizer.


I gobble up my coconut oil first. It’s my favorite. I even like the pre- and pro-biotic pills Mom drops in it. I know they are good for me, too.

Riley surprised us all by eating sauerkraut from Mom’s hand. (He’s a very picky eater.) He didn’t eat the sauerkraut she put in his bowl, though, so when I got back in the house I ran over and helped him out with that.
I love my raw diet.
Love and wiggles. ~ Lucy
On Monday, Mom got her two original neighborhood dogs in for a grooming touch-up. I’ve told you about Dora the shih-tzu and Maggie the schnauzer here. Last week she got another new pup in, a beagle mix named Bella. Bella was scared of my Mom and very anxious, so her Dad stayed during the first part of the groom. That’s why Mom didn’t get a “before” picture. Her Dad wanted her to look like the beagle he paid for when she was a puppy, instead of a terrier with hair sticking out every which way, so Mom shaved her and this is how she looks now. As you can see, Bella was still kinda’ scared, even after Mom sprinkled her magic dust on her.
Before Maggie and Dora came on Monday to be groomed, Mom decided to try out her birthday present from my peeps brother, Andrew. She had been complaining about how dirty the furniture was, so he gave her some more work thing to help with that. She un-boxed her new Rug Doctor, read the instructions, and gave it a try.

Andrew told her to push harder on the head to make it work better.

Then Riley came by and said, “You missed a spot.”
When Mom gave up quit got done, she looked at the dirty water and said, “Cr–p, I don’t know if that’s dirt or part of the chair!”

I think it’s time for me to go outside and chew on my bone for a while.
Love and wiggles, Lucy
Mom is so good to me, I don’t mind if she gets a special day or two. But why wasn’t I included? Saturday was Mom’s birthday, and here’s what happened.
First, Dad made waffles for him and Mom and gave her a real pretty card that almost made her cry. Sheesh, Dad, don’t make Mom cry on her birthday! When they were done eating breakfast, he packed up his horn and “gig bag” (whatever that is) (not important, doesn’t smell of food) and whisked Mom away in the car to a place called the Tennessee Aquarium. Sweet Georgia Sound Big Band were set up to play outside the aquarium. It is a touristy area where people walk around or get pushed in strollers or wheelchairs or ride scooters or get carried on their dads’ backs or in their mom’s arms…any way they can get around. Mom didn’t take pictures because she locked her phone in her purse in her car’s trunk. Umm, I’m glad she doesn’t lock me in the car’s trunk! Anyhow, there was another ballroom dancer named Donald there and they danced together a lot right there in the sunshine. (I wasn’t there to dance with them) There was a 12 year old schnauzer wearing a Tennessee Vols shirt there, and Mom kept getting her “schnauzer fix.” The band leader announced two times that it was my Mom’s birthday and people came by and said, “Happy Birthday!” to her. Dad said it also gave him something called a pass to come out of the band and dance a foxtrot and a rumba with Mom. Some band friends were in town and met them there after the “gig.” The all visited a while (without me), before Dad whisked Mom away again to a part of town called The Bluffview Arts District. (No, I didn’t get to go there, either.)
In The Arts District there are museums and restaurants. The restaurants are all grouped together, like in the collages that Mom makes for my blog. Except they aren’t quite that close together. They all have outdoor seating because it is such a beautiful area, overlooking parts of Chattanooga as well as the Tennessee River.
It wasn’t quite 5 o’clock, so they first went to Tony’s Pasta and Mom made Dad’s mouth hang open when she said she wanted to sit inside ’cause she was so hot. He wanted proof it was really my Mom. She told me that my Dad wanted to make it a super special day, and loves her so much that he would sit outside with her without complaining ’cause he knows she always wants to be outside. But she also knew my Dad was suffering from the heat, so she also did it for him. (I would have waited outside for them, but I wasn’t invited.) All they ordered were salads and gluten-free flatbread to dip in olive oil with reggiano parmesan cheese. And wine. Mmm, wine. I tasted it once and it is good. So, during the hour they were there, Mom didn’t remember to take even one picture. Side note: Angel Lexi got to eat there one October, so maybe they will take me next month and I will remind Mom to take pictures.
Then they walked over to The Back Inn Cafe, where they got their main meal. It is described like this: Elegant Colonial Revival mansion setting features seasonal, globally inspired cuisine & wine.

The steak was a juicy medium rare and delicious (wait, please, while I wipe my drool on the furniture) and too big to finish, so Mom brought half of it home. It’s in the fridge, but I can’t open the door. By this time they had both cooled off, so they sat outside. The top picture shows the TN river, and the bottom picture is the bakery that supplies the three restaurants. The same family – the Patera’s – owns it all. Mom said their waiter was super. Dad listed all his food allergies for him, and the chef changed the recipe and sides on Dad’s salmon so it wouldn’t hurt him.
With bellies full (and my belly was at home, empty), they strolled over to Rembrandt’s where they got dessert. Now, does this make sense? Oh, Mom says it would make perfect sense to a schnauzer.

So that was Saturday. Sunday, they came home early from early church and started cleaning. Dad even ran the vacula. The food in the crockpot had my tummy growling, then more food started cooking in the oven. Pretty soon, my soon-to-be friends came to our house and, after lots of hugs and the obligatory house tour, they all sat down at the dining room table for a feast. Riley and I got put outside. At least I got a bone. When Riley got stuck out there with me, I stayed under the table so he couldn’t get my bone. There has to be a limit to sharing, even with your boyfriend, right?
Later – when the food was all gone – we were allowed back in. The Man loved me and kept petting me. I wanted to show them how Riley and I play, so I started jumping at Riley and biting his face and he started growling at me and biting my face and we were having a great time. I thought the Man would be very impressed, until Mom grabbed us and put us in separate bedrooms. After my new friends left, I spent the rest of the evening with Riley and Andrew, watching stuff on TV in their bedroom. And there ends my story of neglect Mom’s Birthday Weekend.
Love and wiggles, Lucy
Today I am joining my friends in Blogville to tell what I did on my summer vacation. You can visit everyone else by going to Mayor Arty’s blog and clicking on the link. My mom is too stupid busy to know how to put the linky link on my blog.
On my summer vacation, I…
did NOT get to ride on the pontoon boat like Angel Lexi used to – Mom sold it. Or…

star in a play like Angel Lexi used to. Or…
run for mayor like, well, you know. Or…
even start a new career making other dogs look pretty, like my Mom does.
But I DID…
Go with my Dad to visit my
Grandma.
And…

stay with my goodest friend Ms. Martha while my peeps went somewhere without me.
And…
have a great time hanging out with my boyfriend Riley!
Focus on the positive, and your life will be wiggly diggly good.
Love and wiggles, Lucy
On Friday the sun was shining and the grass was long. I decided to enjoy hiding in our front yard to spy on what was happening there and in the street and in the neighbor’s yard across the street and in the woods next to the house and everywhere I can see.

Sadly, I have nothing of interest to report. Today, the sun is still shining but the grass is short, so it isn’t as much fun. I will let you know if anything interesting happens.
Love and wiggles, Lucy
Pee S: That’s our driveway behind me. The road is a long way down the hill, and I have learned to always stay in our yard, up near the house. I am compliant, ’cause I like to be called a “good girl.”
First my exciting news…Mom took me to work today! I don’t know if I got my job back or if she just felt sorry that I have been home alone this week. Riley has been gone with Andrew to I-don’t-know-where, so two whole days while Mom and Dad were at work. I want you to know I was a very, very good dog today. I only pottied outside. I greeted everyone with wiggles and a few licks.

I dug a hole in the grass that was planted last fall. Mom had to fix it. It was just a small hole, so I don’t know what the problem was.

It was a busy day, so towards the end of the day I laid in the hallway outside of Mom’s office to ensure I got belly rubs from everyone. I didn’t want anyone to feel left out. Everyone said I was beautiful and they loved my brindle color. One person said she has a Siamese cat named Lucy and another lady said she has a King Charles Spaniel named Lucy. It was a Lucy kind of day! Exactly at 4:30 I stood up and told Mom it was time to go home. She looked at me kind of weird and said the spirit of Lexi must be resting on me. I really don’t know what that meant, or why I suddenly sensed it was time to go home. It just felt right.
Now, I want to tell you about the dog Mom groomed last Friday. Her name is Sophie and she is supposed to be a shih Tzu. Mom thinks she is a Shih Tzu-Maltese cross. The first and last time Mom groomed Sophie was January of 2015. She was an extremely matted mess then, and was again this time, too. Mom de-matted her and cut her hair with the scissors. It took Mom three hours.

I am going to let my secretary Mom finish up now so she can go make doggie cookies. I might even save some for Riley.
Oh, and I was dog tired last night after my hard day of work at the church.

Love and Wiggles, Lucy


Today is Monday. That means it is Slow Day. Mom calls it my Fast Day, but believe me, there is nothing fast about it. I don’t get to eat anything until supper time. I’m just going to chew my bully horn and look pitiful until then. And dream about what I will get for supper.
We had two grooms scheduled for 11:00 this morning. Then, at 9:00 another lady with two dogs texted to say she was on her way. Mom had forgotten to write it down! She had to hurry and push the 11:00 grooms back to noon. I have shown you pictures of them before when they were here. Laila is on the left.
This time, there was a surprise when the lady showed up with Laila and Louis. Laila looked like this, but that wasn’t the surprise.

Now she looks like this! Notice anything? I mean, besides Mom shaved her and she’s still happy?

Yep, she got knocked up. Where’d I hear that kind of language, Mom? Well…I don’t know…how about, she is in a delicate condition? Just say she is going to have puppies? OK. Laila is going to have puppies and the blessed event should happen on September 6. He, he.
Here’s the culprit, er, guy who, er, the Daddy:

I sure hope they know what they are in for!
Love and wiggles, Lucy
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